The Business
by fuzzydream archive
Summary: Life is a risky business. Modern AU.
1. I

**A/N:** This is a story based on my one-shot, The Business, written over a year ago, that you may find onmy profile but you don't need to read it to understand this one. It's very similar, but this will be slightly different. This story will probably be 5-6 chapters long, and I'll try to update as regularly as I can, but we'll see. I was never going to continue it, but I've had so many requests that I decided to work on it. I suggest you keep your mind open before venturing into this little scenario. ;) Hope it won't disappoint! Thanks Terrie for editing this so quickly! Would absolutely love to know your thoughts.

Disclaimer: I don't own Downton Abbey.

* * *

 _The Business_ by _fuzzydream_

* * *

I.

Anna smoothed her skirt as she waited for the lift to reach the seventh floor. She felt a little nervous, as she usually did whenever she met a client for the first time. She had no idea about what to expect, really. She rarely had any information before she met the man in question, and that made her uncomfortable. But she knew her way around, thankfully, and that was enough for now.

She only knew this man in particular was a businessman from Ireland, so she supposed he couldn't be very young and she had mixed emotions about that; young men were careless and insisting, whilst older men could be a little more selfish, for some reason. Most of her regular clients were older, though; she wasn't sure how that happened, but she knew she made more money than most people her age. Not many young men could afford her.

She was dressed to impress tonight: a black satin skirt that reached her mid-thigh and a light pink blouse with a frilly collar. Her heels were high, but not too high - she didn't know how tall this man was. Anyone would simply think she was on her way to a party, and nothing more than that. If only they knew the truth.

Seventh floor.

The feminine, monotone voice announced, and Anna turned around, looking at her reflexion in the doors of the lift. She opted to wear her long hair loose tonight. She closed her eyes for a second, only a second, and when the doors opened, she had already left Anna Smith behind.

As she stepped into the corridor, she took a look in both directions… room 718… she turned left. The hotel was one of London's best, and surprisingly she had never been here before. It looked expensive, classic and beautiful. It was silent, but then it was quite late already, especially for a weekday. As she turned the corner, however, she took notice of a man walking in her direction, and he seemed to almost nod to her; his blue eyes did not make her feel very comfortable, and soon he turned the corner as well. She stopped in front of the door, looked briefly to one side and then the other, and knocked.

And waited.

She adjusted her bag slightly, and was attentive to the sound of steps coming from inside the room. She frowned at why it was taking him so long, but gave it no further thought. Before long, she could hear the door being unlocked, and then it was finally open.

A man that looked to be in his early forties, with his dark hair slightly disheveled, he had what looked like kind eyes, and he seemed almost embarrassed to find her there - she smiled, hoping to make him a little more comfortable.

"John Bates?" she asked quietly.

He nodded. John Bates smiled and held his hand out, a little awkwardly. It was rather endearing. Anna chuckled and took it. "June, right?" Anna nodded, and he motioned for her to come in. "I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting company."

"That's alright," she said, knowing that she was supposed to be a surprise for him tonight. The room is classic, big and quite nice. Possibly the nicest she had ever been so far. "You've got quite a room here."

She walked further into the room, noticing the big bed in the middle of it, and took a deep breath. She could feel John's eyes watching her and turned to look at him, still standing near the narrow corridor that led to the door.

"You're not very used to this, are you?" Anna asked softly, her eyes twinkling at him. The first buttons of his white shirt were unbuttoned, and he ran a hand through his hair.

"No, actually," he admitted. There was no ring on his left hand. "Would you like a drink?"

Anna nodded; why not? She walked towards the not so small table that held all the bottles of alcohol, and he met her halfway.

"Would you like some wine?" he offered, and Anna nodded. "I'm not much of a drinker these days. I don't know why they are offering me so much," he motioned to the large selection of bottles. "Amazing what people do to try to be your business associate."

Anna chuckled. "Don't I know it?"

John laughed. "I suppose you do," he said, rolling his sleeves up to his elbows to open the wine. She left her bag over on the table, and decided it was getting a little warm here. She walked around the bedroom, stopping by the window. There was a lovely view of Canary Wharf from here. A little off the city historic centre, but lovely as well. London still had that power of looking hopeful to her. As if all the problems could be erased and all her dreams could come true. She tried not to ponder on that too much. She was working. Anna Smith had no space here.

"Did it work? Your possible business associate's technique?" she enquired.

"Perhaps. I haven't decided yet," he told her. "And if it does, I don't think it'll be because of booze or fun."

Anna laughed. "The soul of business is in marketing."

"It is, and sometimes that's an unfortunate fact."

She felt John's presence behind her and turned around, accepting a glass of wine. He had lovely eyes, she noticed as she sipped the red wine. It tasted a little earthy for her, but it wasn't bad at all. She smiled at him.

"If you don't mind me saying, you don't sound Irish," Anna said conversationally.

John laughed. "I'm not. I come from Ireland, but I was born in London. I merely work in Ireland."

"But you live there as well," she said, trying to know a little of him.

"I suppose. I live anywhere the company needs me to," he added. "You don't look like a June."

Anna nearly choked on her wine, decided to let the glass rest on top of a cabinet. Of all the questions she expected, that wasn't it. "Don't I?"

John laughed. "No. I don't know much about you, but your name isn't June," he said simply. Anna said nothing. "I won't bother you, I promise. I'll just not calling you anything. I'm sorry, I'm afraid I don't have much experience with..."

His voice faltered, and she decided to spare him of any embarrassment. "Prostitutes? That's quite alright," she said honestly. "Men like you make me feel as if hope isn't lost, after all."

"Really? Interesting point of view," he nodded. "I married young. And I was married for many years. So I never really went to that side of... Things."

Anna played with her earring distractedly, looking up at him. "See? Hope isn't completely lost."

His glass joined hers on the cabinet.

"I can manage."

He was tentatively close to her.

"I'm sure you can," she breathed.

They stared at each other for a moment, and she wondered if he would do anything, or if she was the one who would have to make a move. His eyes were dark and his cologne smelled great. In the end, she wasn't sure who moved first, but she was glad they did. His kiss was slow and slightly rough, but she liked it. Her eyes closed as she molded herself to him, his hands slipping around her waist and pulling her closer. They didn't speak, but one of them moaned. She started unbuttoning his shirt, and his hands traveled down and down, squeezing at just the right places. He could definitely manage.

It was all very fast, or so she felt it was, really. Before long, they were both undressed, and she was completely naked save for her earrings and bracelet. She moved tentatively beneath him as he reached for one of the glistening packages on the bedside table, and she watched as he sat back on his legs to put it on himself. His hands brought her closer by her hips, almost possessively so, and she felt an unfamiliar thrill run through her body before he knelt in front of her and covered her body with his. She gasped when he entered her, and she felt herself stretching to accommodate his size. It was a little strange but exciting too; when she looked back at him, she felt different. When he gave her a fervent kiss, she felt like herself. When he moved against her, filling all the right places again and again, she lost herself.

Much later, when she came back from the bathroom, as naked as the day she was born, she took her jewelry off and joined him for a blissful sleep; she had been paid for the night, after all. But even if he hadn't asked her to stay, she would have.

He ordered room service before she was even properly awake the next morning, and she found the bed surprisingly welcoming, even with the sun hitting her naked body. They had breakfast in bed, slowly, neither with much hurry - much slower than they should have, really. She had nowhere to be that morning, but she had never stayed for breakfast before. It was a rule she didn't think much about, but only now it was broken.

He had a plane to catch, he later told her, but only in a couple of hours. His eyes were kind and he asked her simple questions - where was she born, as he noticed her accent, if she liked living in London. It was surprisingly easy to make small talk with him. Much more than it should be, really.

Breakfast in bed didn't seem like the best choice after all - because she couldn't resist kissing him again, eager to take the sleep out of his eyes, and she couldn't resist touching him again, feeling giddy at the response he gave her. She couldn't even tell exactly how it happened, but she learned that she loved the feeling of him beneath her, of his lips on her nipples and his hands bringing her closer with each thrust.

But time was a precious thing, and soon she did have to leave. He called a taxi for her, and walked her to his door, but not before insisting she gave him her number - it was against the rules too, but she picked one of the cards she had and wrote her number on the back of it. She didn't want anyone else dealing with John. She could do it.

He kissed her before she left and he was still looking at her when she gave him a look before turning on the corner of the corridor. Perhaps she would never see him again. Perhaps he would call next week.

By the time she reached the lift, Anna was coming to her senses. She couldn't remember ever having such fun in a night of work, and she couldn't remember ever feeling the way he made her feel. He was different, she quickly decided.

But more importantly, he made her feel different.

And when she stared at her reflexion in the golden doors of the lift, she was afraid it wasn't the same reflexion she had seen before meeting him.


	2. II

**A/N:** A longer chapter today - a little stronger on the M-rated side, but I hope you won't mind. If you're not comfortable with that just skip the fourth section. Let me know what you think of this! Thanks Terrie for editing :)

* * *

II.

He didn't call her the next week, or the week after that, so slowly, a little too slowly, Anna was forgetting about him. She never told anyone about him - not Thomas, who had made a smug remark after he handed her the money for the night with John, and Ethel had simply asked how bad it had been, and Anna hadn't felt like elaborating too much. Her flat mate could be a little too nosy about certain things, especially now that she had left the business. Despite everything Ethel had gone through - getting pregnant by a client, being unemployed, and currently facing a custody battle for her baby - Anna envied the fact that she was free of the business.

But soon would be her turn as well. Or so she hoped.

She was trying to cut back on the number of clients she took from Thomas, and thankfully he wasn't complaining too much. She was still trying to finish her course at university, and the recent internship at an accounting company was taking a lot of her time too; it was only the fact that she still owed Thomas that kept her from leaving the business. And unfortunately she made more money on a night working for him than she did at the accounting company in a month. She was pushing for a proper job once her education was over, next year - that would likely allow her to end the... partnership, so to speak, with Thomas.

"I can't believe it's Friday," Anna said as she sat down on the kitchen stool, stopping to tickle Charlie, who was sitting happily in his high chair.

"Do you work tonight?" Ethel asked from her place by the stove, working to make them something edible for dinner.

Anna shook her head. "I hope not, anyway. I've already worked three nights in a row this week. I need some proper sleep."

As if on cue, the tone of her mobile started ringing, and she cringed at the thought of Thomas offering her something tonight. Ethel made a disgusting sound and Anna purposefully ignored the call when she saw Thomas' name on the screen. Not tonight.

"You should just tell him you don't want to do it anymore. Go back to being an escort," Ethel told her quietly. "That wasn't too bad. It wasn't good, but not as bad as... You know."

"I've tried talking to him. It's not as simple as that," Anna sighed, rubbing her temple. "I can maintain myself alright with the internship but I can't pay him. If I keep doing the job, I may be free of debt in a couple of months."

"I know, but you hate it. I know I did, and I was only in it for like a year," Ethel commented. "Thomas let me go pretty fast. And you could always get a bit more money if you went against your rules a little."

Anna shook her head; she could make a little more money on her clients if she accepted a few things, but she couldn't risk it like Ethel used to. She couldn't risk getting pregnant or, worse than that even, getting a disease. She would rather be in the job for a little longer than do that.

"The only reason Thomas let you go easily is sitting in this chair over here," Anna joked, making a funny face at Charlie, who giggled. Her mobile started ringing again. Anna groaned.

"Let me answer it and I'll tell him where he can stick his arse on," Ethel pleaded, and Anna was tempted to do just that, except it wasn't Thomas; it was an unknown number.

Her heart skipped a beat. Not many people had her personal number. Could it be?

"It's not Thomas," Anna told Ethel, trying to sound casual. "I'm just gonna take it inside. Be right back."

"Fine," said Ethel, not entirely convinced by her tone, but Anna paid no attention to this.

Once inside her bedroom, she pressed the answer button on the screen.

"Hello?" she said tentatively, not wanting to raise her hopes up.

"Hello, this is, uhm... My name is John Bates," his soft voice echoed against her ears, and she let out a deep breath. She would know this voice anywhere. "You may not remember me."

"I remember you," Anna interrupted before he could say anything. "I didn't think you would call."

"Is it disappointing that I am?" he asked softly, and his tone meant to be teasing - she couldn't help but smile at his words.

"Not at all," she said, "but does this mean that you're in town?"

"I will be. Are you free tomorrow night?" he sounded nervous. Anna refrained a chuckle.

"Let me check," she said with a sigh, finding her agenda on her desk. She bit her lip as she went through her Saturday evening, a usually busy night. One of her regulars was scheduled for 10. "I have a spot between midnight and two."

"How much for the whole night?"

His tone surprised Anna. She did the math in her head. She would have to cancel all clients - she knew Thomas charged extra for that. "For twelve hours, it would be two."

"I'd like that, if you don't mind," he said softly.

"Of course not," Anna quickly told him. "Where will you be staying?"

"The Grantham, near Hyde Park," Anna wrote it down, but she doubted she would forget. "I'll let them know I'm expecting someone, so you can just tell them you're Miss Smith."

She stopped breathing for a moment. "Smith?"

"It's simple," he explained, a little unsure, but she reminded herself that he couldn't know her surname. "I work for them. So it would be nice to..."

"Maintain appearances, of course," she smiled. "I'll be there at around 10."

"I'll be waiting."

The call ended shortly afterwards. Anna took a deep breath. It was just business, she reminded herself.

Now she had to come up with an excuse for having her night cancelled to Thomas, and she would rather him not find out about Mr Bates.

* * *

She had a card, but decided to knock, just in case. She had been to this hotel once before, over one year ago, but no one seemed to recognise her. The girl at the reception desk had been nice and helpful, and she did not hesitate to give her a card to John's room. The door opened. John's smile greeted her.

"Good evening," she greeted him with a smile, and kissed his cheek upon entering the bedroom.

A regular room this time around, modern but comfortable. She liked it. His clothes were more casual today too. A simple polo shirt and jeans. It fit him rather well, she decided.

"You look lovely," he noticed, reaching for the remote to turn on the television.

She opted to wear a loose light blue dress tonight, creamy heels and a simple pair of pearl earrings. Maintaining appearances wasn't important only to him, in the end. And even in killer heels, he was still much taller than her. And, she noticed - he was barefoot.

"Thank you," she smiled. "I'm under the impression your employees downstairs think I'm your girlfriend."

John shrugged. "Perhaps a partner or a lover. What they don't know won't kill them."

"Indeed," she agreed. She sat comfortably on the chair behind her.

John sat on the bed, facing her. "But they aren't my employees. I'm a commercial manager. We work for the same people."

"For this hotel?"

He nodded, resting his elbows on his knees. "Yes. I'm an old friend of the owner. He's been kind enough to give me this position."

"But if you're in it you must have earned it."

He gave her a lopsided smile. "He was looking to expand the business to Ireland, and I was just there. It sort of fit," he explained simply. Anna nodded. "How have you been?"

The question surprised her. It wasn't something she was asked regularly.

"I'm fine," she said. "Thank you for asking."

Before the silence could get awkward, or his questions turned personal, she stood up, slowly walking towards him. He sat up instantly, his eyes roaming over her legs as she supported her knee beside his hip, and then the other, so she was straddling him. He hadn't touched her yet. She pressed her palms against his chest, and only then she felt his hands graze against the skin of her calves. His eyes never left hers, and she felt slightly nervous. Perhaps he sensed this, because he closed his eyes the next second and moved to kiss the skin under her ear. Anna shifted above him, and she felt her dress go up slightly. They hadn't kissed yet. She ran her hands over his chest and grasped the hem of his shirt, tugging it until he helped her take it off. The sight of his dark chest made her tingle as she remembered their first time together, and she took no time in taking her dress off too. John looked at her for a moment - taking notice of her simple, lacy black lingerie, and she made a mental note of not wearing elaborate underwear as she'd sensed from their first time he preferred simple things.

"You're exquisite," he breathed, and their lips met for the first time of many that night.

And she stopped thinking for a while.

* * *

Anna sighed contentedly, running a hand through her disheveled hair. The city was still making itself known under them, and it was raining a little now, she noticed, as she vaguely looked towards the window. Her eyes blinked slowly. It had been lovely, just like their first night. Perhaps even more so. More than it should be, already she knew that.

She sat back, pulling the sheets over her, letting their coolness engulf her bodies. She tried not to think of the many bland, emotionless hotel sheets she had wrapped her body in, so many times now. Countless times. She shook her head. This wasn't the time for it. The pillows were soft against her naked back and she let out a deep breath. Her eyes flickered to the bedside table. There was a book there - The Complete Works of Robert Burns - and a pair of glasses on top of it. She let a smile grace her features and reached for the book. There was a page marked, and she opened it there. She knew this poem - A Fond Kiss. She liked Burns, enjoyed his works. But this... This was unexpected.

"Do you like poetry?"

John's voice startled her, and she turned to see him walking towards the bed, very much naked, to join her. She nodded weakly, closing the book.

"I do," she said, settling the book down once again. "Is Burns your favourite?"

"Possibly. Probably," he admitted. "Who is yours?"

Anna pondered on it. "I like Browning, both of them. I suppose they are my favourites."

"Both good choices," John commented. She didn't know why, but she felt suddenly nervous at spending the night with him. He scratched his neck slowly, and she noticed she had left a mark there. "Do you read a lot?"

Her shoulder brushed against his arm. "I do, when I can. It's a bit hard. I don't have as much free time as I'd like, but then, who does?"

He chuckled. "That's correct," she could feel him watching her. She fidgeted with her fingers a little. "So what do you do, then? I mean, besides..."

She laughed when he flailed his hand a bit, unsure of what to say, and she felt at ease again. "I'm... Trying to finish school. I got a internship that keeps me quite busy right now, but doesn't pay well."

"Internships rarely do," he commented, and she nodded. "What do you study? If you don't mind me asking."

"That's okay. I'm in business school," she said simply. "Hopefully I'll graduate next year. Took me long enough already."

"Better late than never," John said, and she tried to keep herself from yawning. He chuckled and she felt his arm around her shoulders. "Come here. We should get some sleep."

He pulled her closer, and she snuggled against him, closing her eyes. She knew she couldn't let herself get too attached - she had other regular clients (if she considered John as a regular now) but they never talked much. This, this talking, the time they shared - she could almost pretend this was just her and her man, talking about their days, enjoying time together, and falling asleep in each other's arms. She was working, after all. But this little haven, this little nest she had for tonight and only tonight - perhaps she could allow her to pretend for a little while.

And she did.

* * *

Morning came all too quickly. They had forgotten to draw the curtains the night before, but it was barely past 8 when Anna opened her eyes for the first time. She yawned, not very ladylike at all, and blinked heavily. Looking over her shoulder, she could see that John was still asleep. He grumbled a little when she moved - surely he would be up soon, the way his eyelids fluttered. She sat up, taking one of the sheets with her, and took a moment to watch him sleep. They only had two more hours. A sigh escaped her lips.

Wrapping the sheet around her body, just so she wouldn't reveal herself too much, she walked towards the window. Park Lane was busy underneath them, despite it being a Sunday. They were on the top floor, but she could make out silhouettes of people jogging and walking their dogs. The rain seemed to have stopped for now. She was used to it - one couldn't expect any different from London.

Movement from the bed made her turn, and she saw John rubbing his eyes sleepily. She bit her lip when she noticed the way the sheets were tented around his hips - no doubt a natural effect of the mornings. She loosened her hold on the sheet and it slipped below her shoulders, barely covering her breasts. A familiar tingling ran through her body as she watched him move, and she leaned against the wall. A moment later, his eyes found hers.

She saw him twitch under the sheets upon seeing her, and she smiled at him. John groaned.

"Come here," he asked softly.

Her sheet pooled at her hips, leaving her breasts exposed. "Why don't _you_ come here?"

He groaned again, only to sit up the next second. She watched his movements, his erection standing proud as he stood up, and he had just started walking when he remembered they still needed protection. His eyes had an almost predatory look as he took the wrapper and opened the package with his teeth, and slipped the condom on his member with practiced ease. She watched him, feeling the heat pool between her legs, but he didn't touch her when he reached her. His palms were splayed against the wall, on both sides of her head, and she could feel him hard against her stomach.

"I'm here," he whispered, and his eyes still held a little trace of sleep. She wanted to be the one to take it off.

She kissed him, pushing his lips down to hers, exploring his mouth as she had done previously, but she couldn't get tired of it. His lips were soft, yielding, and his hands had their own goal; they slipped over her backside, squeezing her, and lifted her up. The sheet fell onto the floor. Her hips moved of their own accord and he shifted, aligning themselves. He entered her slowly, and they both groaned at the contact, but his next thrusts were fast and long, almost slipping completely out of her and entering her again and again. She wasn't sure what she needed - support or strength or release - but she looked for it in him, letting her nails dig into his shoulders and back, feeling the energy build up between them.

"John," she said between her breaths. He didn't stop his thrusts. "Oh, God, John."

Pleasure. Coming to her as suddenly as hundreds of shooting stars before her eyes, clenching her muscles and making her forget everything except him and herself, inside this bedroom. She was still moaning when he accelerated his thrusts and had his own turn of pleasure, before stilling his movements completely. He rested his forehead against her shoulder and relaxed his hold on her legs.

"Don't let go of me yet," she asked, "my legs feel like jelly."

He chuckled, leaving a wet kiss on her neck.

It was too good to think this bedroom was her world.

* * *

He had watched as she got herself ready to go; putting on some make-up, combing her hair. He wondered if she would still work today, but for some reason he preferred to believe he would be her only man this weekend. She had smiled - her hair curled at the ends and she looked absolutely gorgeous. She made him want to stay with her for another day, or perhaps a thousand more. She was a complete mystery, one he was eager to find out.

They had breakfast together, again, and he took notice of how much she enjoyed strawberries and the way she complimented the eggs - she had never eaten the hotel's food before, she had said, and she very much enjoyed it. Not for the first time, he wondered how such a clever, smart woman could be in the profession she was in. He wanted to find out, but he couldn't - not without asking her.

They had left the room together. He didn't hide that he was going to visit his mother and have lunch with her, and she mentioned she had some items to study for work tomorrow. He felt relieved to know she was just going to study today. He insisted on waiting for her taxi, and they spent a few quiet minutes in the lobby before it was announced that the taxi had arrived.

He insisted on paying for the ride, and gave the driver enough to drive right across London, so he didn't think it would be a problem, even when she insisted on taking the tube. She kissed him, one more time.

"Are you free Friday night?" he asked her before she got into the black car, surprising even himself.

She smiled. "I am for you. Same place?"

He nodded, and opened the door for her. "I still need to know your name, you know."

"You already know my name," she replied. "It's Miss Smith."

She closed the door and smiled at him one more time before the car drove away, and he stood on the steps of the hotel entrance, staring until he couldn't see her anymore.


	3. III

**A/N:** Thank you so much for the encouragement and feedback! I was going to update on Monday but thought... why not update today? Updates come early if people review more! ;) Let me know what you think of this. Again, second scene is heavily smutty, so you've been warned! I'm a little nervous as it's a little more graphic than I'm used to writing, so any feedback will be great. Thanks for reading!

* * *

III.

She looked lovely. Her hair was in a ponytail today, and she looked younger, somehow. He wondered how old she was - he didn't think she could be younger than 25 - and he hoped she wasn't - but tonight he wasn't so sure. She had a beautiful smile, and she seemed more comfortable now. He knew he had surprised her when she got to his bedroom and he led her out, telling her they would have dinner together.

Perhaps it was the romantic in him, but John didn't like the idea of taking a woman to bed without even dinner first. It was a different experience for him - she was doing it because she was being paid after all - but he liked to pretend it wasn't like that. He enjoyed their time together. Sex was... Fantastic, to say the least. But their conversations were interesting too. Their silences were good too. He wanted to know more of her.

Now, she was smiling at him - they had been talking about her childhood, in Yorkshire. She didn't mention where she was born, but he could guess that it was a small village. She had enjoyed life there, and he had trouble linking the farm girl to the woman in front of him. No, not the woman in front of him; he had no trouble seeing her as a happy Yorkshire girl. The woman she was when she wasn't with him.

"Excuse me," the waiter approached them. "Would you be interested in our menu of desserts?"

John looked at her expectantly. She shook her head.

"Oh no, thank you, but I couldn't," were her words, but he didn't believe them one bit.

"Come on," John insisted. She bit her lip, and her eyes twinkled when she looked at him.

"I really shouldn't," she insisted.

John nodded to the waiter. "We would like to see the menu, please."

The waiter promptly complied, recommending the choice of a proper Italian ice cream - the restaurant was Italian, after all - and she decided to follow his suggestion, choosing a chocolate flavoured one. John simply handed the menu back, not really in the mood for dessert, and she opened her mouth in surprise.

"You tricked me!" she said, sounding indignantly, once the waiter left them.

John laughed. "You wanted dessert. You should have some," he told her, and she shook her head, allowing herself to smile. "I'm sorry if I've made you uncomfortable. By bringing you here, that is. I know it must be...unusual."

He needed to make sure it was okay. Surely she wasn't taken to dinner so very often - in fact, she had been so surprised when he told her that he thought she had only composed herself by the time they entered the restaurant. It was nothing too fancy - the restaurant was somewhat fancy on its own, but still casual enough. It was inside the hotel, so it wasn't as if it was a very special dinner.

"It's fine," she told him quickly. "It's great, actually, just caught me by surprise. But thank you for this," she added. "I haven't had this much fun in a while."

"The feeling is mutual," he told her, and it was not a lie.

Her ice cream came not long afterwards, and he watched her with interest. She was wearing a black dress with white lace that fit her very well, and her ponytail bounced every time she moved her head. He was mesmerized. Her smiles were frequent and he realized that perhaps his own dessert would be when they reached his hotel room once more.

And he learned that she had a sweet tooth - a small, but sure step forward.

* * *

John sat on the edge of the bed, unbuttoning his shirt. She had retreated to the bathroom almost as soon as they had arrived from dinner, and he wondered if she would take too long to get ready - it felt a little different today, for some reason. He would be lying if he said he had had a lot of experience with women like her, but he knew enough of it to know that she was different.

Perhaps it was one sided, but he believed they had what they called - chemistry. It was instant for him. Whenever he saw her, he felt a stirring deep inside. His mind, his body. He longed to feel her around him. To hear her voice and her opinions.

He didn't have business in London this weekend, and he didn't have much the week before either. This was getting particularly dangerous, and he knew it. But he couldn't stop it - he missed her. Craved her, even.

He took off his shirt and threw it on the bed behind him. It was a little late. They spent a long time in the restaurant, and he had to admit he felt a little tired - he had endured a few hours of airports and a flight earlier, after all. This bedroom was slightly different, just slightly. There was a slim mirror in front of the spot he was currently sitting. He thought he looked old - he supposed his forty one years of age sometimes took its toll on him. He became self-conscious though - if he wasn't paying, he doubted she would ever give him a second glance. He was probably right.

The bathroom door opened with a click, and he turned his head towards the small corridor that led to it. She showed up then - with a smile on her lips, wearing a brown corset that hugged her slim waist tightly and made her breasts look absolutely gorgeous. The corset was accompanied by a set of rather skimpy knickers of the same colour, along with garters, a garter belt and her black heels. He was speechless.

"Will I do, Mr Bates?" she asked, and he loved the way her lips pronounced his last name. She tilted her head, the ponytail behind her swaying, and he found himself nodding.

She walked with purpose towards him, her hips moving in a dangerous way, and he opened his legs further so she could stand between them. He ran his hands behind her legs, covered by stockings, and he stopped when he reached her garters, stroking the beginning of her exposed skin. One of her hands supported herself on his shoulder, whilst the other reached behind her, pulling out the elastic from her hair, making it cascade around him. His mouth felt dry.

His hands squeezed her bottom as her nails trailed a path on his torso, finally reaching his trousers. She leaned down to undo his belt, and he took advantage of her position to kiss the valley between her breasts, leaving a wet trace there. She successfully undid his belt and pulled at his trousers, kneeling in front of him to take them off. His boxer shorts were already tented, but she remained kneeling, kissing his belly button and lower. Her crystal blue eyes stared back at him and he groaned in anticipation of what was to happen. Her hands dug at his hips and he felt her mouth kissing him over his boxers; he felt tight, almost begging to be freed. Before long, her hands pulled at his boxers, and he stood in front of her, hardening even more. Her eyes widened slightly, but she smiled.

"Do you like this, John?" she asked, taking off his shorts completely and reaching for him.

"God, yes," he told her. She stroked him a few times, and he felt her kiss his tip softly, quickly. He opened his eyes and watched her - lick him, stroke him, kiss him. His hands inevitably reached for her hair. And then she took him in her mouth.

He let out a moan. She was slow at first - trying, fitting him. She sucked softly, her tongue tasting him, taking him deeper. He felt tighter than ever, but in the best possible way. Her hands stroked the skin of his hips, and he let out a groan when she released him, only to take him again. Her mouth left a wet trace over him, and he was desperate to feel more of her. The corset gave him little access to her breasts - he tried to take it off, but it was hard to concentrate when she was on him like that.

He managed to unhook the first set. She gave him a dirty look, one that he did not ever wish to forget, and let him go.

"You are a very naughty boy," she commented, kissing the side of his hip and making her way down.

He twitched, letting out a loud groan when she kissed more sensitive flesh. Her hand never stopped stroking him. He managed to unhook another set. Only one left. She took him in her mouth again, sucking only at his tip. He didn't think he would last long if she kept this up.

"Darling," he pleaded, the term of endearment escaping him. She stopped her ministrations. "You better stop now or we won't be able to continue this the way I want us to."

She released him, giving him an understanding smile, and reaching for the bedside table for protection. He watched her pert bottom with interest and took a deep breath. She opened a package, and put the condom between her teeth.

Oh, dear god.

His eyes went to the back of his head as she put it on him, and released him the next moment. He really wouldn't be able to last long tonight.

Thankfully, she seemed to understand that, for she unhooked the last set of her corset and let it fall to the floor. She stood up, and he pulled her closer, turning her around in his arms. His hands squeezed her breasts and she let out a moan. He let his palms roam over her and kissed her lower back. Her legs shifted when he felt the wetness between her legs and he groaned - he could feel it through her knickers already. Swiftly, he took them off - thankfully she had put it on after her garters - and she lowered herself down, aligning them. She was so, so wet - he couldn't remember entering her as easily as this. He could almost feel himself reach her end as she took him completely inside, opening her legs further, her back teasing his chest. She moved up, and down again. Her dark eyes met his through the mirror.

He had never seen such an erotic sight before.

She rolled her hips slightly, moaning with each new thrust - she was exquisite, and he felt her walls tighten with tension around him. They needed to be quick. One of his hands teased at her nipple and the other ran down her torso, stopping just where they met again and again. He stroked her there, gently at first, and she cried out - his movements grew faster and soon she was clenching around him, her breathing hard against his other hand, and he couldn't control himself any longer. Her spasms were erratic now and he moved up her fast and hard and he felt bliss again - white, hot and electric. His muscles relaxed and he lay them down on the bed. She was still slack against him, so still and so light. Before they both could breathe properly again, she turned, ever so slightly, and kissed him - deeply, slowly - and he couldn't help but grin in satisfaction. She slipped off of him, turning so she could lay on her back, and he watched as her chest worked to breathe regularly again.

Neither spoke for a long time. Words weren't necessary.

* * *

Anna leaned on her elbow, feeling the hairs on her arms stand up as the sheet uncovered them slightly. She supposed the temperature had cooled down significantly since they decided to sleep. Her eyes were fixed on John's form, wearing only his underwear and rummaging through something on the hotel's minibar. One look at the clock told her it was only a quarter past one. She yawned, and he turned around.

"Did I wake you up?" he asked. The only light on was coming from the tall lamp in the corner of the room, and it was quite dim still.

Anna shook her head. "No, it's fine," she said, stretching her arms lazily. She could do with a few more hours of sleep.

"You're probably tired from the week," he figured, standing up. She admired his body as he walked around. Not bad to look at, at all. Especially when she knew exactly what he was able to do. "I've got… some fruit and biscuits. No alcohol today, I'm afraid."

She laughed. "That's quite alright," he gave her a soft smile as he walked back to bed. "You're gonna eat that in bed?"

He sat beside her. She was still lying down. "Why not? Ah," he said, taking a biscuit from the package. "you're one of those people who hate crumbles in bed."

He offered one to her. Belgian chocolate - her favourite. She took it. "Only when I'm the one who must clean it afterwards."

John laughed. "Fair enough," she reached for another biscuit. "Tough week?"

She swayed her head - it wasn't all that bad, just tiring. She had had to avoid Thomas quite a bit - he was mad at her for cancelling the clients for John, but he did not know the reason yet, and she didn't plan on telling him. She simply told him she needed a week off - off this job and this world, for once. He hadn't liked it but didn't seem to do much besides threaten her that she would eventually run out of money if she kept declining clients. The month was ending, and she was able to earn some money - from John, mostly - and she didn't think Thomas would complain when she paid him.

"The usual. I've taken some nights off," she said, sitting up beside him, "so this is my first night of work since our last. I was looking forward to it."

His arm nudged her ribs lightly. "Don't joke."

"I'm not," she insisted with sincerity, taking a look at the box of fruit on the nightstand beside him. "Are those grapes?"

He nodded, reaching for the box and handing it to her. He had a teasing smile on his face.

"Don't judge," she asked him, taking a grape from the box and eating it. "I don't refuse fruit or chocolate, even after the lovely dinner we had. And it's been a few hours since that."

John chuckled. "I won't judge, darling, I promise."

The term of endearment was there again. He had called her that a few times, but this was the first time it was said when they weren't having sex and she felt - perhaps intimidated was the best word for it. No man called her that, not really - or when they did, they didn't mean it. But John - he was different. She knew he meant it. She simply trusted him, and she had never trusted a client before. She couldn't explain it, not really. It was just… chemistry. More than that, even. Not just physical.

They ate their midnight snack in comfortable silence until Anna offered him some fruit and when he declined, she put the plastic box aside to lie down again. She relaxed against the pillow, taking a deep breath.

"Did you change the thermostat?" she asked softly. "I feel kinda cold."

"I noticed," John said, pushing the biscuits aside and lying down too, but on his stomach, and he propped himself on his elbows to look at her. His eyes went to her breasts.

Anna let out a laugh. "You are a cheeky beggar, aren't you?" he leaned down to kiss her lips. He tasted like chocolate.

"I didn't change it, but I can if you want," he offered.

She shook her head, covering herself with the sheets and moving closer to him. "No, it's fine. You can keep me warm."

He smiled. "That I can do," his arm went around her waist, drawing her closer, and she looked up at him, half expecting him to initiate something, but he didn't. He ran his fingers through her hair, stopping to stroke the scar above her left eye, and she felt suddenly self-conscious. But he kissed her there, softly, and his next words were unexpected. "What's your name?"

It threw her off - none of her clients knew her real name. They only knew her as June, the prostitute. A simple, short, meaningless name. It wasn't who she really was, not really. None of them ever asked her this question. None of them were interested - they saw her as a body, something to use as their own. This question meant so much more than plain curiosity. It meant more than teasing, more than any quick shag they might have had or may have in the future. This question meant the world.

And for the first time, she realised that John Bates thought she was different.

He must have registered her surprise though, because he closed his eyes the next second and shook his head.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked." It was endearing, to say the least. He was blushing, and his ears were getting red too. She smiled to herself, and he was still speaking. "I mean, I just would like to say your name when we're… Or just have a contact for you on my phone…"

"My name is Anna," she interrupted him. He said nothing. Anna laughed nervously. "I know, very boring."

He smiled, though. "No, it's lovely. It's perfect."

"It's ordinary. Just like Smith," Anna said, feeling the need to defend herself, somehow.

"You are Anna Smith?" he asked, looking incredulous.

Anna laughed. "Anna May Smith."

"I love it. It's a beautiful name," he said, and she believed him.

He lowered himself onto the mattress and kissed her cheek.

"The ordinary can surprise us," he told her in a whisper. "Don't underestimate it."

Silence reigned afterwards, and she didn't feel like initiating anything either - this recent development weighed on her like nothing before, and she watched as he eventually fell asleep beside her, snoring gently against her ear, an arm draped across her stomach and his chest hair tickling her shoulder. In the back of her mind, she knew that this wasn't how clients behaved. She was experienced enough to know that clients didn't want to know her name, how her week was, and they didn't hold her close in their sleep.

But it wasn't as if knowing her name made him know everything he had to about her.

* * *

"How did you get this money?" it was the question Thomas asked, when he counted the pounds she had handed him in a little package, just now.

Anna couldn't tell him about John. No one knew - Ethel suspected, but that was it. John paid her some extra last time too - she only saw it when she got home, and when she enquired about it in a text, he simply said that he wanted her to take it. She was managing to live off on her internship income, just barely, and her last two nights with John made for a good income, even for Thomas. Of course he was surprised. She knew he would enquire about this. But what he didn't know wouldn't hurt him.

"I do have another job, you know," she told him, rolling her eyes. "I got a bonus."

"We both know that job of yours can barely pay your bills, let alone me," Thomas growled inside his office at the agency. He tossed the money on the desk, but Anna didn't bat an eye at him. "Have you been seeing your clients without them getting to me first?"

"No," she told him quickly, "I told you I'm taking some time off."

"You work with sex, my dear Anna. You don't simply take some time off it. It's in your nature," he told her dramatically. Anna fought the urge to roll her eyes. "I had to schedule your clients onto the other girls' nights. That Frank guy enjoyed Angie so much he won't want you next week. You'll be losing all your regulars if you keep this up."

The thought of having sex with another man sickened her. She couldn't stand it, not right now. It had been bad enough in the weeks following her first encounter with John.

"I can manage."

"Are you shagging your boss?" Thomas enquired.

"I am most certainly not," Anna said indignantly. "I just need some time off. I can manage myself, okay?"

"But you can't, or you would have abandoned the agency long ago," his tone sounded dangerous. "Unless you've got yourself a rich boyfriend. The dream of every call girl."

"I don't have a boyfriend," Anna stood up. "I got a bonus. Be sure to cross that from my debt with you."

"I will, don't worry. You've still got a way to go," he reminded her.

She didn't need to be reminded. She knew the extent of her debt and she knew how much she still owed him. She knew she would have to eventually take the agency's clients, but she would postpone it for as long as she could.

"Hey, Anna."

She turned around one more time.

"I'll find out how you're getting this money."

She hoped he wouldn't. John would be in London next Saturday and she would see him then - they arranged it before she left last time, and he had shyly told her that if she wanted some time off he wouldn't want her to make an exception for him. He couldn't know that he was the one who made her take this time off - that he was the one to make her want to live on this fantasy that there was more between them than business. It didn't matter that she felt hollow every time she left him - it didn't matter that she wanted to cry the moment she closed the room's door the last time, after their goodbye.

Thomas couldn't know this. He could tell something was happening, and she hated that. She would make sure he wouldn't find out about John.

"Good luck with that," were her parting words.


	4. IV

**A/N:** This chapter is the longest as of yet, and I must say that this will likely be the only one without a love scene - but then, intimacy makes for love as well, so this chapter says a lot in this arrangement Anna and Bates got themselves in. This story was going to be around 5 chapters long, but now it's looking like a 9-10 chapters run. We'll see; it won't be more than 10, though. Anyway - hope you like this one! Would love to know your thoughts. Remember, the more you review, the faster another chapter will be updated. Thanks so much for reading!

* * *

IV.

Everything had gone wrong. First, she had volunteered to work on a Saturday, hoping this would earn some gratitude at the accounting company. Then, she ended up having to work late, and it had started raining in the middle of her walk home from the tube. Her umbrella broke - probably her own fault, really, even if it was particularly windy. The moment she opened the door to her flat, she slipped - she had been so careful while walking, the second she stepped home was the one she had been paying no attention to. Ethel had hurried to help her up, while little Charlie wouldn't stop giggling.

"Are you okay?" she asked, a little worried. "You are drenched, Anna."

Her clothes felt tight and uncomfortable, soaked from the rain.

"My umbrella broke on my way here," she revealed, feeling a little miserable. "And I'm late as it is."

She took her very wet coat off and hung it on the wall hook in the little hall. Ethel gave her a hard look and Anna rolled her eyes.

"I'll clean this all, I promise," she said, "I'm just late. I'll work tonight too."

She barely spoke and a sneeze escaped her; she paid no attention to it. Ethel frowned, balancing Charlie on her hip.

"Maybe you shouldn't work tonight," she suggested. Anna shook her head.

"Not an option," she told her. "This was scheduled last week."

Ethel sighed but Anna paid no attention to her, taking off her shoes and walking towards her bedroom. She looked at her wardrobe, wondering what clothes she should wear. The way the weather was today, she would rather wear some jeans, but she rarely wore those for work. She chose a simple black dress - she would put on some nice stockings and wear that light coat, and hopefully that would keep her dry. She showed the dress to Ethel and she nodded.

"It's fancy," she said, "simple but fancy."

"He likes simple," Anna allowed herself to say.

"I don't know who this guy is," Ethel said, "but just be careful."

Anna stopped moving the clothes about and turned to look at her flat mate.

"I'm always careful."

"I know you are, but we both know this is the only customer you've been seeing," Ethel said softly. "I don't know why you're doing it, or why you chose him. But I think you're doing it behind Thomas' back. Just be careful."

"I'm careful, Ethel," she said, shaking her head. "Don't worry, okay?"

Her friend nodded and left the bedroom. Anna knew Ethel meant her words as good advice - but Anna knew she wouldn't make the same mistakes Ethel had. She didn't have this fantasy that a client would meet her and fall for her and rescue her from silly, difficult world. This kind of thing only happened in films. She knew life wasn't a fairy tale. She didn't see John like that. She was growing attached to him, she did know that, but that didn't mean the opposite was true.

Or so she hoped.

* * *

Her head felt heavy when she knocked on his door, and she sneezed again. Undoubtedly, the rain she caught on the way to the hotel didn't help. She couldn't breathe properly, and her feet were starting to ache on her heels. She didn't feel comfortable at all.

John opened the door with a smile, though that disappeared the moment he looked at her. Was her hair looking bad? Maybe the rain messed it up. Or maybe her clothes were too wet.

"Anna," oh, how she loved the way her name sounded from his lips. He let her in. "Are you alright?"

She nodded, though she wasn't being honest. He was wearing a pair of faded jeans and his undershirt - barefoot, once again. "I'm fine, I think I must have caught something - do you mind if I freshen up?"

John shook his head worriedly. "No, of course I don't mind. Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm-" she coughed. She had really had better days. "Sorry. I'm fine, I just need to freshen up."

John helped her with her coat and took her bag and she went into the bathroom, not very surprised to see her nose red and watery eyes. The white room felt cramped and made her feel unwell. Her head was aching and she closed her eyes, but she couldn't breathe through her nose. Maybe she should have cancelled. Her bed sounded so tempting to her right now - not an option anymore. She shook her head, grabbing a few tissues to blow her nose. She felt a little light-headed, but managed to breathe a little. It would be fine - it wasn't as if spending time with John was a chore. So she wasn't in the mood for sex - well, more like her body wasn't - but she could endure it just fine. Maybe she would even feel a little better afterwards.

She ran her fingers through her hair and made it look a little more presentable - there, she wasn't looking so bad. Apart from the red nose, she was fine. She opened the door. Damn London and it's silly, temperamental weather.

The room was almost identical to his previous one, and Anna slowly walked through the small corridor from the bathroom to the bedroom. She found John sitting, on the bed, tying his shoes. He had put on a shirt, too. He looked up at the sound of her steps.

"I'd like to take you home," he offered. Anna immediately shook her head. "Come on. You're in no state for anything tonight."

"I'm fine," she insisted. At his stern look, she conceded him some honesty. "Alright, I've got a headache. And a running nose. I look awful, don't I?"

He gave her a sympathetic smile and stood up. "You look gorgeous, as usual. But you don't look very healthy," he put on a jacket. Anna leaned against the wall. "Stay if you want to. But I'm going out and getting you some medicine."

"That's really unnecessary," Anna insisted. She watched as he opened the wardrobe.

"It's either that or I'm taking you home," he said, turning to look at her and crossing his arms.

She didn't want him to take her home. That would mean he would know where she lived, and that would yet be another line they shouldn't cross. More than that, she wasn't too eager to go home and be awoken by Charlie's cries - he was teething and Ethel had a hard time keeping him quiet. If she stayed - she could always try to convince him to do something. Even if it wasn't much.

"Fine, I'll stay," she sneezed. He gave her a pointed look.

"There," he gestured toward the wardrobe. "Grab whatever you want to make yourself comfortable. I know how it is when we're sick."

"I'm fine, honestly."

"I can see that," John said patiently. "I won't be too long. Just make yourself comfortable."

And just like that, Anna found herself alone in a hotel room.

* * *

He was struggling to find the card to the door, holding so many packages at once. Perhaps he had exaggerated, but he had never really been in this situation before. Thankfully, the door opened for him, and he only saw Anna's head, her body hidden behind the door. He muttered thanks and her eyes widened at what he was carrying - a bag from the pharmacy, another from the grocery store, and a small bunch of flowers. He felt embarrassed, all of sudden - she wasn't his. She wasn't anybody's, not really. But especially not his.

"My mother - she always says that flowers can cheer anyone up," he offered as an explanation. It wasn't a lie. Anna smiled, closing the door behind them, and taking the flowers. She was wearing his old blue Millwall t-shirt, the same one he had used for a nap that afternoon. She was still wearing her stockings, even though the shirt looked a little too big for her lithe body. Sexy - too sexy. He shook these thoughts away.

"Well, your mother is a wise woman, then," Anna said, curiously looking at his other bags. "What have you got there?"

"Chocolate," he revealed, "biscuits, some snacks. And medicine for you. Have you had any dinner?"

She considered his question for a moment before shaking her head negatively. He handed her the bag from the pharmacy. "I'll order us something to eat."

"You shouldn't," Anna's eyes were pleading. "I mean, this is... This is so much already."

"I could use some real food," he told her simply. It wasn't a lie either. He wanted her to feel better. He wanted her to know that he... Cared. Even if he shouldn't.

They each devoured their burgers and chips, and Anna looked much better after eating and taking some of the medicine, though she still wasn't at her best, he could tell. Her appetite wasn't gone, and he supposed that was a good sign. Afterwards, he stood up to organize the room a little, and Anna looked out the window, apparently lost in thought.

"Before I came to London I used to say that I would get in the tube and walk around Hyde Park every day," she commented with a lazy smile. "Like the nobility used to do."

"Did you ever do that?"'John asked, watching as she lay herself on the bed.

"Maybe twice," she confessed.

He took off his trousers, but kept his undershirt and boxers on. "Do you miss it? Yorkshire?"

Anna tilted her head, hugging her knees. "Not particularly. Just... The way life was before. Simpler. It doesn't have to do with the place, I guess."

He understood, and nodded. He felt Anna's eyes on him as he sat beside her.

"Are you always like this?" she asked suddenly.

He frowned. "Like what?"

"Just... Thoughtful. Brooding," she corrected, and let out a chuckle. "I feel like you are often miles away from here."

He gave her a smile. "I'm here."

She chuckled again. "You must drive your wife or girlfriend crazy."

She had never made such an assumption before. Did she think he was married? Or had someone over in Ireland? He shook his head quickly, not wanting her to think the opposite.

"I suppose I did drive my wife crazy, and that's why we divorced," he told her pointedly, and Anna's gaze was lost. He relaxed against the mattress - it was still quite early. It wasn't that he didn't want to talk about the divorce - it was more like... This was different territory for them. He had noticed that whenever conversations turned personal Anna was quick to distract him in some other way, and then the conversation would be forever forgotten. It was oddly convenient, and very annoying.

"I'm sorry," she said softly, "I shouldn't have said anything."

"That's fine," he assured her. "I've been divorced for about two years now. It's not as if it's a new thing."

She rolled on the bed, lying on her side, facing him. Her eyes narrowed. "Do you have children?"

John shook his head. "No. I wanted to, but my ex-wife never didn't," he explained. He was glad for it now. The divorce took long enough without them fighting over children. "I'm glad we didn't. She would have been a terrible mother."

They laughed, and he found it surprising how easy it was to talk about these things with Anna. He wondered if she had children. She could, by all means. She didn't seem like someone who would fall into a trap or be in this job because she wanted to. No, she had a good reason to do this - or so he hoped. He couldn't bring himself to voice his questions, not this time.

"Were you married for long?" she asked. Her curiosity surprised him.

John sighed. "9 years or so. Way too long, if you want my opinion," he chuckled. "After about two years the passion died and it was torture."

"I guess passion always dies," Anna commented, though she sounded unsure. He wondered if she had a serious relationship - she could, by all means. He could be understanding or she would be a liar. He found himself wondering how he would react if his girlfriend was a call girl - he wouldn't be able to do it. It was bad enough with Anna, and he liked to pretend he was her only client.

John ran his fingers through his hair, thinking about her words. "I don't know. For some reason, I still think it's not like that. Not when the affection is deeper. Passion without love ends," he told her, "but I like to think it doesn't when it's the opposite."

Anna rolled again, closer to him, on her stomach. Her face was partially hidden in the pillow, and his shirt had rolled up around her hips. Her hand was drawing slow circles on the duvet. She looked exquisite. A tired smile crossed her features. "You are a romantic."

John chuckled. Their faces were very close now. "I suppose I am. Aren't you?"

Her palm rested on his chest now. "I don't know," was her simple answer. "I'd like to be."

He slowly reached for her hand, and gave the back of her knuckles a kiss. She laughed; he was mesmerized. She was a mystery - the best kind of mystery - and whenever he thought he was close to figuring her out, he was lost again.

"I'd have to have someone to be romantic with," she continued, furrowing her brow.

John frowned. "Don't you?"

"I have too many, I suppose," she gave him a sad smile, "and that's precisely the problem."

* * *

They ended up talking late into the night, and after some time, when Anna's eyelids began to flutter, they decided to get some sleep. She awoke not long afterwards, with her nose blocked once again, and the medicine helped, but by then she was too awake to go back to sleep - with the way she was feeling, any sleep she might have would probably be a little uncomfortable. Chancing a look at John, who was sleeping rather soundly, she reached for the remote and turned the television on. She muted it, hoping it wouldn't wake him. She doubted he had planned on spending the night like this; the least she could do was to let him sleep.

Her heart dropped a little when, switching through the channels, her eyes fixed on a black and white film. An old favourite of hers, when she hadn't seen in a very long time. She should change channels, she supposed. But something kept her there, watching as Vivien Leigh's character ran through Waterloo Bridge, confused and depressed. Why couldn't she get a happy ending? Perhaps this was the fate for anyone on their line of work - a continuous feeling of unworthiness.

Anna's gaze left the television just as Myra's last act was dropped - her eyes fixed on John's sleeping form. Who would have done for her what he did today? She couldn't say - couldn't remember anyone. She had no family and very few friends. She barely even talked to Ethel these days, and they shared the flat. But John stayed with her - shared his bed with her without asking for anything in exchange, bought her medicine and dinner and listened to her silly nonsense. He made her feel hopeful - he made her want to believe in romance and love and passion. He made her want to live an illusion as if it was reality.

Her hand reached to stroke his hair - soft, so soft. He was lying on his back, facing her ever so slightly. She hugged her knees closer to her body, letting the back of her fingers graze against his temple.

"You're making me fall in love with you," she whispered softly, the words coming to her as easily as they had creeped into her mind and as hard as his sweetness had covered her heart. "I can't do that to you."

She couldn't. She couldn't play with her own feeling and pretend everything was okay the next morning. It simply wasn't. Her gaze turned back to the television. Robert Taylor tucked Myra's charm into his coat pocket and got into the car. A lone tear escaped Anna's eye, and she brushed it off. She looked at the lilacs he had brought her earlier.

She couldn't keep seeing John.

* * *

When she woke up, a few hours later, her head was still quite heavy, but she felt slightly better. She stretched herself on the bed, noticing she had drifted quite close to John in her sleep. She let out a tiny groan, breathing in his scent, and felt his finger against her jaw, so softly. She opened her eyes.

"Good morning," he said, and she looked up from her spot on his shoulder, moving to her pillow slowly. She felt the loss of the contact instantly. "Feeling any better?"

"A little," she confessed, groaning when she noticed the time. "We've slept too much. I need to go."

"It can't have been twelve hours," John frowned, reaching over her to check the clock. "I don't remember sleeping this much since university."

She giggled. "I take the drugs, and you're the one who gets drugged," she nudged against his ribs, and John flinched. Anna bit her lip, and he hovered over her, his hands perilously close to her waist. She wriggled in anticipation, but he didn't do anything, settling his hands against her cheeks instead.

"I won't torture you with tickling," he said softly, and she smiled up at him. "At least not now, with you sick."

"It's just a cold," she insisted, her hand reaching to touch the collar of his shirt. "It's not like I can't do anything."

"May I kiss you?" he asked. His eyes were the same shade of the green leaves she played with in Yorkshire during spring. They hadn't kissed since the other week. She nodded.

Their lips met slowly, tentatively, as he leaned down. Her eyes closed of their own accord - and she felt electricity run through her body when their tongues met. She tried to deepen it - move her lips swiftly beneath his - but he didn't let her. It was over quickly, far too quickly.

"Will you stay for breakfast, at least?"

She nodded again. Words escaped her.

They got up afterwards; they took turns in the bathroom and she took her medicines again. When she got back, John had already ordered their breakfast, and she meant to get ready to go, but he was reading the newspaper and had invited her over to the sofa - and she couldn't bring herself to say no. This couldn't be their last time together - one more time, she decided. One more time, if he wanted, and that would be it.

Breakfast had just been finished - she had devoured it quite fast, as hungry as she was, but if he noticed he didn't say anything - when he brought up the subject of a next meeting.

"I have a proposition to make," he started.

Anna took a sip of the orange juice and looked at him. "Yes?"

"I have a... I have a couple of events coming," John said slowly. Was he nervous? "Next weekend. Two events, actually. On Friday and on Saturday. It's in our first hotel, in North Yorkshire. A dinner gala of sorts and a garden party. I wondered if you'd like to go."

"In Yorkshire?"

John nodded. "Yes, Downton Abbey is our first hotel. They've renovated it, and there's to be a grand reopening of sorts," he explained. "I'll understand if you don't want to go - it's your home county and I'm not sure if you'd like to be an escort. I'd pay for the whole weekend, of course - Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I can pick you up and leave you home."

To say that she was surprised was an understatement. She thought about his offer - she hadn't been an escort in at least a year, but that should be quite easy. Three days would give her enough money to pay Thomas for the month, and she could buy herself some time too. But one word struck her.

"Well, it's... Did you say Downton?" she repeated. John nodded. "That's... That's where I came from."

"Really? You must know the building then."

"Of course. But I've never been, obviously," she said. The hotel was expensive and fancy. It was a beautiful building, but unreachable in so many ways. She hadn't been to the village in almost two years.

"I understand if you don't want to do it," he continued. "I know it's a long time."

She opened her mouth, but no sound came. She didn't know what to do. There were memories in Downton - too many. The job wasn't even a problem, it was about the location. She took a deep breath. One weekend with John. One last weekend.

"I'd love to go," she told him with a strained smile. "If you're sure. I used... I used to be an escort, so that's not a problem. How many events are we talking about, two?"

John nodded, shifting in his chair. "Yes, and perhaps a dinner on Saturday. You never know with Robert."

He explained the business to her - a dinner gala, a tea party, dinner with the owners - John's friends. They settled on a value for it, and he didn't even flinch. She charged a little less than Thomas would, but it was still a large sum of money. They talked about the dates and the venues - soon the food was gone and she insisted she had to leave. He was watching while she dressed and she watched through the mirror when he put the money from the night on the little table. She complained - it wasn't fair to charge him, not when they didn't do anything, not when he went through all this trouble for her. But he insisted; he was paying for the company, and even asked if that had never happened before. She couldn't argue with him, and took the money, albeit reluctantly.

She remembered to take the flowers too and he insisted she take the medicines with her, going so far as offering her a ride home. She declined - it was surprisingly sunny and she could use a little time in the tube thinking of what happened - and what was to happen.

He kissed her before she left, still in his nightclothes, and she teased him that he would get her cold - he kissed her again just because.

* * *

Her thoughts were everywhere as she walked - on the upcoming events, the last night they shared. She could still feel his taste on her lips when she reached the Underground, but she could only think properly when the Central line train arrived. She could almost feel his hands on her skin, his t-shirt covering her body and his scent all over her. Thankfully, she managed to find a seat quickly. A couple sat across from her, and she averted her eyes. The lilacs she was holding were enough to make her smile, but she would hate to see them die in a vase soon.

The voice outside the platform was just announcing they would close the doors when someone walked in, and Anna looked up, her mouth gaping in surprise. She clutched the lilacs tighter.

It was Thomas.

He sat beside her as the train began its ride. No one batted an eye at them.

"If he's paying you, he's got to get through me first," he warned her, his voice very soft, perilously close to her ear. "If he's not, you'll end this, at least during the nights. Your nights are mine."

When she remained silent, his words became a threat.

"If you don't end it, someone else will. You have one week. I'll find out either way."

Anna nodded, still silent.

 _The next station is Bond Street._

The intercom voice sounded vague against her ears. Thomas stood up, and left the moment the doors opened, without looking back at her. She choked back a sob.

Her illusion was gone.

Real life was ahead.

* * *

 _* I know. A fic where John Bates is not a Manchester United fan? But well... John Bates is a London boy, born and raised, and I think his team would be a local one, not a big one either. So there. :)_


	5. V

**A/N:** So here we go - the first part of their weekend! At first the whole weekend would be one chapter, but now we will have... three chapters of it. I hope it won't be boring! Let me know your thoughts! Last section is M-rated. ;)

* * *

V.

It was Thursday evening, and Anna was quite busy.

She looked around, a little unsure of what to take. She had been an escort several times before, but only to an event and that was it. To spend two nights away and more than one event meant something different altogether. And she wanted it to be special, somehow. She bought new lingerie just for this - she probably shouldn't have, considering that was the one thing she didn't need any more of. But she wanted to look good for John, and she didn't want him to touch what other men had before (her body, her skin were tainted enough). She picked out a white cocktail dress, with a simple cut but with a nice detail of pearls on the low cut back, for a possible dinner. Two nightgowns - her best ones - and a bikini, just in case. She still needed to find the perfect dress for the gala, and for the garden party.

A knock on the door startled her, but she answered anyway, and Ethel entered her bedroom, her eyes roaming around the clothes on the bed and the still empty suitcase open in the middle of the floor.

"Going somewhere?" she enquired.

"I'm going to Downton," Anna said.

Ethel frowned. "But you haven't been to Downton since-"

"Yes, I know," she sighed. "I'm not going because I want to. I'm going because... Because a client hired me. As an escort, for the weekend."

"At Downton?" Ethel asked, still perplexed.

"He works for the Granthams. The group who owns those hotels," Anna explained, sitting on the bed. "They are reopening the hotel in Downton and there are some events."

"And he hired you for the whole weekend?"

Anna nodded. "From Friday to Sunday."

"Wow," Ethel breathed. "Good for you. Is he the one you've been seeing lately?"

"Yeah, that's the one," Anna said simply. "I need to find a dress for a garden party and a dinner gala. I have some but they don't seem appropriate enough."

"Why not? You have some great clothes," Ethel gestured to the open wardrobe.

"I don't know. I don't want to stand out," Anna bit her lip. "I want to fit in, and this event will actually feature some lords and the like. It's unlike any event I've ever been to."

"Seems like a lot of effort for just some bloke," Ethel commented, leaning against a cushion.

"His name's John," Anna told her. He wasn't just some bloke. Ethel arched her eyebrows.

"Okay. But what does John want? Taking you to this sort of fancy event," she knew where Ethel was going. "You wouldn't even consider returning to Downton before, Anna. And now you're going, not as you, but as..."

"He knows my real name," Anna interrupted her, closing the doors to the wardrobe and sitting on the bed again. "I know I shouldn't have told him but it slipped. He's just... He's different, Ethel. You wouldn't understand."

"Wouldn't I?" Ethel asked, and Anna looked up. "I loved Charles, you know."

Anna blinked, unshed tears in her eyes. "I know. I'm sorry."

"I'm not. I have Charlie," Ethel continued, "and even though Charles was an arse, I wouldn't have Charlie if it wasn't for him. But he tricked me. Are you sure this John isn't tricking you?"

Anna shook her head. "No, no, he's... He's just... He's so sweet. And caring," she allowed herself to smile. "But I... I'll end this on Sunday. After this is all done."

"Why?" Ethel asked, though an understanding look crossed her features. "Thomas?"

Anna nodded, closing her eyes. "Him too. He threatened me, but... I was going to do it anyway. John doesn't belong with someone like me."

"Why ever not?"

Anna rolled her eyes. "Look at me, Ethel. I'm a prostitute. He knows that. A guy like him will never choose a girl like me."

"You never know. Remember Jenny? She married a client."

Anna let out an incredulous laugh. "He was seventy years old!" she shook her head. "That wasn't about love. On either's part."

"So it is love for you?" Ethel asked. Anna said nothing. "Look, if it's like that, just... See how he acts. Maybe he can help you out of this life. You never know."

"I'd never let him do that."

The thought hadn't even crossed her mind; she didn't want a savior, a knight in a shining armour. She wanted someone who cared - about more than just money and physical contact. Her debt was hers, and no one else's.

But before Ethel could speak again, Anna's phone rang - she picked it up, and her flat mate stood up; Anna frowned when she saw it was a text from John.

 _"Realised the events are not as easy for a lady as they are for me. Would love to take you shopping tomorrow morning, before we leave - on me, of course. And I insist. X"_

"He wants to take me shopping tomorrow before we leave," Anna said, before she could even think. Ethel stopped at the doorway.

"And there's the answer to at least one of your problems," she gestured to the clothes on the bed. "I'm curious. Is he anything like Richard Gere?"

Anna let out a loud laugh. "Stop it!"

"Not even a little?" Ethel insisted. Anna followed her out of the bedroom.

"John's tall," she started, "has a much better voice and I think he must be so much better in bed."

"Better than Richard Gere?" Ethel repeated, then slapped Anna's arm lightly. "No wonder you're in love."

Anna laughed as she sat on the sofa, quickly typing out a reply.

 _"I could use an outside opinion while shopping. X"_

* * *

The GPS had guided him to the directions Anna told, after much insisting on his part, and he managed to find her building just fine. Having rented the car for the upcoming days in England, he found traffic much more chaotic than he remembered. She lived in an old looking building, but well maintained, not too far from King's Cross. He managed to get a parking spot close by, and before he could even think about getting out of the car, she was tapping his window. She looked lovely as usual - wearing flat shoes, a blue skirt and a simple yet fitting white blouse. Her hair was in a ponytail, and she carried one suitcase, not very big.

"I pack lightly," she told him at his questioning glance, and she put the suitcase on the back seat, insisting he didn't have to get out of the car - almost as if she didn't want him to be seen.

He took her to a little boutique in Kensington, one that Mary recommended, since he really didn't know where to shop for women's clothes in London. Anna seemed impressed, and told him several times she could pay for her own clothes, but he insisted - he knew these events were probably not the kind of thing she would normally go to, and he didn't want her spend her money on him - even though he spent his on her so often, he thought darkly. But that was just the way things were; he thought she needed the money more than he did. He was well off now, recovered from the divorce, with a good job and a good house in Ireland. He didn't have children or much of a family, and his house was sparsely decorated, as he didn't feel the need for investing much on it when he had no one to share it with. Grantham paid for his expenses whenever he traveled and he never spent much in London anyway - most of what he spent was for the time he spent with her. And that was well worth it.

If they didn't find what was needed here, they would go to a shop Mary suggested in Soho. But judging by the look on Anna's face, he thought she would do her best to find the dresses here.

The shop was classically decorated, and only one other woman seemed to be shopping - it was quite early, he supposed, for women who didn't have any work to do and had their husbands' money to spend. He was the one who spoke to the saleswoman - a nice woman whose eyes kept going from Anna to John, probably wondering what their relationship was. Anna was small next to the woman, not wearing heels and dressed simply. But the woman gave them a smile and proceeded to show them the dresses.

He hung around, commenting on this and that - he didn't pretend to know much of fashion and accessories. They started with the garden party dresses, and he sat back on a little sofa while she tried some of them on. They looked absolutely exquisite on her - loose or form fitting dresses, it didn't matter. She looked good no matter what. Anna usually went for lighter colours, more classically designed, and he approved. Now, she appeared with what must be the fifth dress - a loose white one that stopped at her mid-thighs, with frilly sleeves that ended at her elbow. There were little flowers all over it - flowers of the same colour as her eyes.

"What do you think?" Anna asked him, a touch of uncertainty in her tone. "I'm not sure if I prefer this or the last one."

"I like this one," he commented, motioning for her to come closer. "The flowers match your eyes."

She smiled, blushing slightly under the sales woman's gaze, but she rolled her eyes goodnaturedly. "Sweet talker. This one, then?"

"You could always take both," he offered, and she threw him a stern look.

"No, just this one, thank you," she said teasingly, turning around to go back to the fitting rooms. He watched as she walked away - it was too good of a view to miss, but he felt flustered when he caught another saleswoman looking at him.

Thankfully, his phone rang just then and he could go back to being a businessman temporarily.

Anna was breaking out in a sweat from trying on so many dresses. The dress for the garden party had been an easy choice - the dinner gala dress, not so much. She loved many of the dresses, but none of them seemed to be right for her, or the occasion. She opened the door to the fitting room, looking to both sides but not finding the saleswoman. This dress was quite pretty - nude and black with a lovely neckline and some geometric figures on it. It did make her breasts look good, she had to admit it. But she wasn't sure if it was the one.

She waved to John, who was sitting on the sofa at the end of the corridor, into the store, and he looked up from his phone alarmingly. She gave him a smile.

"Could you help me with this one?"

"Of course," he said promptly, standing up. She thought he looked quite good today - smart dark jeans, a black polo shirt with his sunglasses hanging on the collar.

She turned around as he approached, one of her hands holding the front of the dress and the other on her back.

"I can't zip up," she revealed, pulling her hair to the side so he could see it. She felt a hand on her waist as he pulled the zipper up. Anna met his eye through the mirror of the fitting room in front of them, straightening herself up. "What do you think of this one?"

"Gorgeous," he said, looking at her.

Anna cast a judgemental look at the dress. "I think it shows too much cleavage and back. It's lovely but I need to be a little bit more covered."

He chuckled against her neck, his breath reaching her ears and making the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. "I think you need to be uncovered, actually."

"Mr Bates," she told him as a warning, but her voice came out as weak. "Behave."

"I am," he said, smiling down at her, and she turned around to properly look at him.

"I think I'll try some other dress," she told him. His eyes were dark.

"If you want to."

They kept looking at each other for a few more moments, and Anna couldn't keep her gaze away. She bit her lip, and he leaned down - so close, so close to her.

But his phone rang.

He muttered a curse under his breath and pulled away from her. Anna released a shaky breath. He reached for his phone and took it out of his pocket. Anna leaned against the wall; she felt quite hot.

"Hey, Robert," John ran a hand through his hair. "No, no. I'm in London. Yes. Well, soon."

The saleswoman showed up then, bringing another dress with her. Anna smiled politely when the woman complimented the dress she was now wearing, handing her the new one. It was dark blue, almost black, and it seemed a little different than the ones she had tried. Anna explained that she would take this one if they didn't find another, and just as she was about to close the fitting room's door, John spoke up.

"I'll have to take this outside for a bit," he told her, his hand over the phone. "Do you mind? Will you be okay for now?"

She smiled. "Yeah, of course, you can go."

The saleswoman smiled at her before she closed the door, and she set on putting the dress on. This one had sleeves, and she rather liked that - very different from the others. The back was closed, though it showed quite a bit of cleavage - just enough. It seemed to shine against the fitting room's light; it was discrete enough that she would fit in, but impressive enough that John would like it. It was snug against her waist, complimenting her figure quite a bit. She bit her lip; John was likely still outside, as she couldn't hear his voice.

She opened the door, and the saleswoman looked at her expectantly.

"Oh, that looks gorgeous on you," she quickly said. "It's as if it was made for you. Honestly."

"Thank you," Anna said softly, allowing herself to smile. She half wanted John to come back so he could give her his opinion too. "I don't think it'll need any alterations, do you?"

The woman analysed the hem of the dress and shook her head. "No, it's perfect. Your partner will love it."

"You think so?" she could see John's back behind the window of the shop, still on the phone. "I was going to wait and see if he liked it, but I think I'll make this a surprise."

"That sounds lovely. I'm sure he'll adore it," the woman said with a smile. "You can just see how much he's devoted to you. You're a lucky girl."

"Yes. I know," Anna's smile faltered slightly, but she thanked her anyway, taking some time admiring the dress and then going back into the fitting room to take it off.

She traced the jewels on it before checking the price tag, just in case. It was so expensive - more expensive than anything she had, really. But it was still cheaper than the one she had tried before. And John would absolutely love it, she knew he would. And this was for him, right?

He only returned when she was going to the counter with the saleswoman, curiosity in his eyes as she saw them tucking both dresses into bags.

"Did you find one?" he asked eagerly, his eyes twinkling.

"I did," Anna replied, "but it's a surprise. So don't ruin it."

He surprised her himself by leaving a kiss on her temple, and smiled at the two saleswomen who were behind the desk. "I won't."

He paid for the dresses and insisted on carrying the bags for her, even when she said it was unnecessary. His free hand sought hers and their fingers automatically laced together. The sun was shining and he took the suitcase she had put on the back seat in the trunk. Her dresses promptly joined what must be his suit in the bag that hung on the backseat, and she teased him about not peaking into the bag where her navy blue dress lay, and he gave her a smile that was really just for her.

She really was a lucky girl.

* * *

They left London by mid-morning, and the sun was shining then; the ride was comfortable and easy, though Anna was slightly anxious about going to Downton. John explained a bit of everything to her: the structure of the company, the owners, the hotels. He wasn't really a manager - he was a director in Ireland, part of the company's board, thus why he was sometimes needed in London for meetings and negotiations. He didn't go into details and she didn't particularly ask for them.

They stopped for lunch at a little pub when they had just arrived in Yorkshire - the Red Lion. By then, the sun was covered by clouds, and John joked that there wouldn't be much of a garden party if it rained tomorrow. His hand rested on the small of her back anytime they walked together, and she felt her skin sting there every time he pulled it away. He sat beside her at the table, instead of across from her, and she stole some of his chips.

She had missed the air in Yorkshire. To see the bushes and trees move against the wind. To see the dales and hills and sheeps. Sometimes, during the ride, she would hold John's hand - or his would rest against her thigh. In a way, it was as if she was coming home.

Not much had changed in Downton lately, but she wasn't very surprised by it. They passed through the village slowly, with John driving. She saw her mother's old house on the way to the Abbey and her heart felt tight in her chest. She saw some faces - faces she barely knew really; couldn't remember their names or their voices. But she was sure that if they stopped she would eventually run into someone she really knew.

Downton Abbey was bigger than she remembered. The event tonight would be closed; it seemed that the hotel would only open for guests next week, so there was only a selective group of people invited. John cited his name and they were soon let in. She had forgotten the grandiosity of it; the garden was blooming and there were people working on it. John stopped the car in front of the main entrance, and soon there were young men arriving to open their doors. Anna felt slightly out of place, but John turned around and walked towards her, after greeting the men. His hand held hers and she felt safe again.

"Don't worry," he said, leading her towards the entrance. "I know it's a little pompous but that's Robert for you."

Anna laughed; John was such a discreet man to have such pompous friends.

But then, she remembered sadly, he was the one with a prostitute under his wing.

To say that the building was fancy would have been an understatement. The lobby was lovely, with people already working, and they were given cards to a bedroom fairly quickly, without worrying about checking in. Just as John led her up the stairs, a man was walking down, and he gave them both a smile.

"Bates, my dear fellow!" he said, meeting them on the landing. He and John exchanged a warm handshake, and he looked curiously at Anna. "And you must be the woman who is keeping Bates away from us."

Anna was puzzled at his words, but smiled nonetheless, and they shook hands too.

"This is Anna," John simply said, with a smile. "And this is Robert Crawley, the Earl of Grantham."

Anna arched her eyebrows, unsure of what to say; Robert looked casual in jeans and a t-shirt, seemingly a little older than John. Before she could say anything, he spoke.

"Call me Robert, please," he insisted. "You don't know the place, do you?"

"I'm from the area, but I've never been here before," Anna confessed, and Robert gave John's shoulder a slap.

"Give her a tour, Bates. Show her around," the Earl said, nodding. "Cora and I will have tea on the balcony outside soon. Would you like to join us? After you've freshened up, of course."

John looked questioningly at Anna, who shrugged lightly and nodded. It wasn't her place to decide.

"Sure, we'd love to," John said at last.

"I'll call your room to let you know when we're ready," Robert told him. "Where are you at?"

"The White Room," John told him, and they parted then with polite smiles.

They reached the room soon afterwards; it was on the first floor, but in a rather secluded corner. Anna liked it. The room was fair to its name - the walls were creamy coloured, its furnitures white and clean; the bed was huge and with creamy linens as well. Everything was perfect, and quite possibly the most beautiful hotel room she had ever seen. Their luggage was already there, and her dresses and John's suit were already in the closet. Anna went to the window, eager to see the whole estate - they could see a little bit of the village but most of the view was filled with gardens and lakes. It was better than she ever dreamed of.

John seemed impressed as well.

"How do you like it?" he asked with a smile, sitting on the bed.

"Like it? I love it," she told him honestly. "This is amazing."

He rose from the bed and wrapped his arms around her from behind, and she leaned against his solid body; they hadn't been intimate in nearly two weeks, and she craved him, more than she would ever admit to anyone. His hands slid lower, to her hips, and he kissed her neck. She turned her head and their lips met urgently - it had been building up since he arrived to get her at her place, and she had missed his mouth against hers. His hands roamed over the front of her thighs. Their height difference made him hover over her.

"Robert will call soon," she breathed, knowing they couldn't take this much further.

John groaned, but nodded against her. "You're right. We can finish this later."

He gave her a quick peck on the lips and pulled away. She missed his warmth immediately and she suddenly wasn't very keen on waiting until tonight, after the gala, to be with him. As he left to use the bathroom, she had an idea.

* * *

They strolled around slowly; it was quite warm and they weren't in a hurry. The gala would be much later on but he knew they would have to be back soon so Anna could get ready. Tea had been pleasant with Robert and Cora. Most of the guests would arrive for the gala and few were around the hotel. The workers were also leaving, little by little, and they were quite far from the house now. Anna had changed her flat shoes to creamy heels, though he wasn't sure why. But every time she looked at him he thought she was planning something.

Well, he wouldn't complain, whatever it was.

She handled the meeting with Robert and Cora well, even more than he originally thought she would. Conversation was easy - save for a few inconvenient questions. They asked how they had met, and whilst he was at a loss, Anna quickly came up with them having a few mutual acquaintances. They mentioned the fact that John barely saw them in London anymore, due to her, and to her credit she did not question him - at least not yet. The clouds were starting to gather; it looked like it would rain. But he still had one more place he wanted to show her.

"Come on," he reached for her hand. "There's a place I'd like to show you."

They had been on a quick tour to the garden, as Anna requested of him, expressing curiosity, and Robert encouraged it, so they left tea and went straight into the garden.

They walked on the pathway meandering through the park-like setting until they finally reached a gate, and John smiled at Anna.

"A secret garden?" she asked curiously.

"Precisely," he told her, and her eyes twinkled as if she were a child.

He could tell she was mesmerised by it. The flowers were colourful and the garden was well maintained. There were a few benches, but not many. A path of bushes turned into archs formed the way of the garden, where the visitor could see everything. Suddenly, thunder echoed from the sky.

"We'll have to be quick," John warned her as she walked ahead of him, looking around.

"Are you afraid of a little rain, Mr Bates?" she shouted over her shoulder, and he couldn't help but follow her.

He felt as if he would follow her anywhere. And that was a rather scary thought.

As it was, rain started right afterwards; a few fat drops fell on them as they walked, neither minding too much, until the rain fell heavier. They took shelter under a large tree, Anna's giggle filling the air surrounding them, and he couldn't help but smile too. A few drops fell onto her white blouse and he could vaguely make out the silhouette of her bra. Her smile was enticing. Her hands ran over his chest and met his shoulders. She pulled him close, and kissed him.

It happened so fast, he could barely register it. Her hands roamed over him - his torso, his shoulders, his back, his hips. Her breathing was fast and erratic, and when he pulled away her eyes were dark. Her arousal was more than enough to feed his own, and he pushed her against the tree, his hands squeezing her breasts over her blouse and her bra, and it was simply not enough. He was already hard, what with the way her hand was now teasing him through the jeans, and she moaned when one his hands slipped under her skirt.

He could feel her heat before even touching her, and when he did, he was lost. Anna moaned louder. They were quite far from the house and no one would come here. The rain continued to fall.

A thought struck him.

"Anna," he breathed, just as she unzipped his trousers. "I don't have anything with me."

She stopped her movements then, her eyes widening, and then she crouched down to pick up her bag (he couldn't remember to hear it falling onto the ground).

"I've got it," she announced, flashing him the golden wrapper and he took it.

"You naughty girl," he growled, and she turned around, looking at him over her shoulder. He understood what she meant - and now the change of shoes made sense too.

She really was a naughty girl.

He held her close, managing to pull himself out of the opening of his boxers and trousers, and put the condom on. His hands pushed her skirt up, slowly, and Anna moaned again, wanting him to hurry. Her backside gave him a perfect view and he twitched, moving her underwear aside and running a hand over her, feeling her wetness. He buckled his knees slightly and Anna leaned forward; if she weren't wearing the heels, he didn't think this would have worked.

But it did, and he entered her slowly, almost painfully so. His hands grabbed her hips and he began to move.

He watched as he moved in and out of her, as Anna's back curved deliciously in this position, the way her hands looked for support on the tree. He stroked the skin of her behind and moved faster; she felt good and tight around him. He reached forward and grabbed one of her breasts with his hand, teasing her. Thunder echoed again. A few drops were beginning to get through the foliage of the tree. Anna was biting her lip, her eyes closed in concentration. Damn. He wouldn't be lasting long at all.

His hand moved down, touching her most sensitive place, and she cried out, her legs buckling. He felt her walls clench around him and he gave in at that moment, feeling relief reach his whole body.

They stayed there just for a little longer. They helped to straighten each other up - Anna had thought of everything and even brought a plastic bag so they could get rid of any evidence. She was smoothing down her skirt and their eyes met; both released a shaky laugh.

"I had never done that before," he commented, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"What?"

"In a public place," he replied.

She bit her lip. "Me neither," her confession surprised him, though he knew it shouldn't. Her eyes shone with mirth. "It was rather fun, wasn't it?"

He nodded. The rain had stopped - for now, at least. He kissed her one more time, deeply, before she laced her fingers with his and they started a slow walk towards the house, only stopping by a trash can to get rid of the evidence of their encounter. It was their secret. No one would know.

He looked forward to trying new things with her this weekend.


	6. VI

**A/N:** Second section is M-rated, but it's quite revealing in some aspects, so I wouldn't miss it! Things are starting to become clear... Let me know what you think! Would love to hear your thoughts and theories of where this is going. :)

* * *

VI.

Anna opened the bathroom door and peaked into the bedroom; empty. John was likely talking to Robert in the corridor about whatever deal they were hoping to close this weekend. She had spent the better part of the last hour getting ready for this gala, and she felt her stomach flutter. She always got a little nervous after these things, for some reason. Her long hair was wavy today, and when she checked it in the long mirror by the bed she felt comfortable that it looked okay. She managed to put on the dress without much help. Her make-up was light and discreet; she didn't wish to stand out.

She put on her earrings - small pearl earrings, the best ones she had - and decided against any more jewelry. She let out a shaky breath as she examined herself now, her outfit complete with the heels. Anna adjusted the cleavage slightly and ran a hand through her hair, giving it a little more volume. She felt good in the outfit. Everything would go well. It suited her.

The bedroom door opened in that moment, and she turned from her position, smiling nervously as his eyes focused on her. He was looking positively delicious in suit and tie, looking very dashing. The door closed behind him.

"Will this do?" Anna asked, a little uncertain at his silence.

John's eyes were dark and he smiled at her. "You look... Breathtaking."

She felt heat cover her cheeks. "Thank you. I just need to get my bag and I'll be ready," she told him softly. "We're not late, are we?"

"Oh, no. We might be the first ones there, the way the ladies take so long to get ready," he said. She picked her dark clutch bag from the bed and he offered his arm. "Shall we?"

She nodded, holding his arm tightly.

He seemed to sense her hesitation and smiled down, just as he opened the door and they left the room. He patted her hand softly.

"It'll be fine," they started walking down the corridor. "Will a kiss ruin your make-up?"

Anna giggled then, feeling a little more at ease, and they kissed softly, quickly, but it was enough to make her feel relieved.

* * *

As it was, this dinner gala wasn't as different as Anna expected. There was a lovely band playing a classic song when they arrived, and everything seemed to be in motion. A few people had arrived already, and they were placed at a table with an elderly couple, Mr and Mrs Carson - according to John, he was one of the directors as well. He was a little too serious, but the lady, Elsie, was very sweet to her. John introduced to her as simply Anna, and no one seemed to mind it.

John's assistant in Ireland, Tom, was there too - she had heard of him, but it was nice to put a face on the name now. He was young - she guessed he was around her age - and Irish. Another couple she didn't know, Mr and Mrs Molesley, closed their table. Conversation flowed easily - they didn't ask much, and certainly no personal question was made. She couldn't see any face she recognized later, when the room was crowded and speeches were being made.

John kept a hand on her thigh the entire time, and that made her feel safe somehow. She was a little confused with all the flatware and different glasses, but she hoped no one noticed - she thought she saw Elsie giving her a sympathetic smile when John quietly explained the overall set-up to her, though everyone seemed to be in conversation then.

The food was delicious - all courses, and she wasn't ashamed to say she devoured it. Their afternoon rendezvous had made her rather hungry. Everything seemed a little more casual afterwards - John's arm rested against the back of her chair, his hand occasionally brushing against her neck.

"So how long have you been together?" Elsie asked a while after they had dessert and Anna was thoroughly laughing at John's words that he hoped the next course wouldn't take too long.

Anna stopped laughing, and John seemed to be at a loss for words.

"Not long," she replied. "A month or so. Right?"

She looked at John for confirmation. He nodded.

"He pretends he has business in London often to visit her," Tom said, finishing yet another glass of champagne. "You live in London, don't you?"

Anna nodded, perplexed, and looked back at John. "You don't go to London on business?"

He shrugged and smiled. "Not always."

"I had no idea about that," Anna said, and the others at the table laughed. "I suppose I can't complain, either way."

Conversation continued, but this stayed with her. Had he lied about his trips to London? It seemed like everyone knew that he had met someone there and that was the reason for his visits - whilst she had always thought his visits were frequent and necessary. Still - she didn't dare to think he had gone just because of her. No, that couldn't be it.

Couples filled the dance floor as a slow song began to play, and Mr and Mrs Molesley joined them quietly. Tom had disappeared and she saw him later at another table, talking to a young woman. The world didn't stop for anybody. Mr and Mrs Carson left soon afterwards, and John suggested he and Anna to go speak to Robert for a few minutes, as was customary. There, she met Robert's daughters - and she was astonished that he had children just a little younger than herself. But then of course, he was an Earl - she doubted he had struggled much with anything in life before. Still, it was pleasant, and she had even managed to strike up conversation with Mary, the eldest, and her fiancée, John's hand never leaving her waist.

They stayed there for quite some time until John asked her for a dance, which she accepted, especially after Robert noted that he had never seen his friend dance before. The music was a slow one, and the steps seemed to come easy for them, together - it simply fit. His hand was warm, splayed across her waist, to the middle of her back. His eyes were soft and he smiled.

"Are you having fun?" he asked quietly.

"I am. Are you?" Anna asked him.

John sighed dramatically. "I am now. Charles kept wanting to talk about business, and Robert isn't much different."

"All work, no play," she teased him, and he gave her a knowing smile. "You'll get to play later."

He let go of her waist and she gave a twirl, coming to rest against him one more time. His hand was slightly lower on her back than before.

"I must say, you look marvellous in this dress," he commented, looking around the ballroom. "But then, you are marvellous."

She bit her lip and looked around them. The music was loud and they were talking low enough that no one would hear them.

"I think you'll like what I'm wearing underneath too," she said nonchalantly.

His eyes hovered over her torso. "Really?"

"Well, I hope so," Anna said innocently. "Though you've seen it before."

His eyes darkened. "Is it the black set?"

Anna shook her head, meeting his gaze. "It's nothing."

Understanding crossed his features and his mouth opened a little, but no sound came. She giggled and his hand held her tightly. The song ended; another was about to begin. John looked behind it and nodded; over her shoulder she could see that he had been looking at Robert. He let go of her and reached for her hand.

"Shall we go?"

Anna nodded, wordlessly. It was quite scandalous to leave the ballroom just like that, and she felt a thrill run up her spine. It was easy to leave; the corridor was empty and the lift was right there for them to enter. She was breathing heavily. The lift's doors closed; John pressed the first floor button. She knew they were being filmed, but she did not care.

She pulled at his tie and his arms settled against her sides. But before they could touch, the intercom voice announced they had reached their floor. John's hand found hers, pulling her out of the lift. She couldn't stop looking at him, mesmerized by his smile and dark eyes. Their steps were rushed but they walked together, and soon they reached their bedroom. Anna giggled when John couldn't seem to fit the card right - he either took it before the light was green and put it in the wrong way. She tried not to be too loud, but she had drank a few glasses of champagne; she was a little tipsy.

She had never let herself get even remotely drunk with a client before.

But she was done pretending John was like any client.

He managed to get the door open, and they got in. For a moment, time stopped; they had had a rushed encounter that afternoon, but it had been enough to keep their feelings under control. John took off his suit jacket. Now, they could go slower, Anna realised. She wanted them to go slower. She reached for his tie again, loosening it up. John's hand stroked her sides slowly. They seemed to be on the same page.

They always were.

He helped her raise the tie over his head and threw it on a chair. He leaned down to kiss her then, their lips moving in a slow, familiar dance. Anna began to unbutton his shirt. John moved his lips to kiss her jaw. She ran her hands down his shoulders and arms and his shirt fell onto the floor. He was kissing her neck.

"I love your chest hair," Anna commented, running a hand over it. "Did I ever say that?"

John pulled away, his hand stroking her ribs over the fabric of the dress. He chuckled, and frowned. "Really?"

Anna nodded, and their smiles met in a kiss. One of his hands cupped her breast.

"Well, I love your chest," he said, massaging her there. "So we're even."

Anna chuckled, "I guess we are."

His trousers followed his shirt soon afterwards, and their kisses grew more urgent, as did their hands; Anna gently pulled at his boxers and John clumsily stepped out of them - they both laughed. He reached behind her to unzip her dress, as he announced she was too overdressed; the dress fell off her shoulders and she took the sleeves off her arms, letting it pool around her hips. With her breasts exposed, his hands quickly cupped them, and she stroked him, leaving him harder every time. John tugged at the dress, and it finally fell completely. She stepped out of it, still wearing her heels, and pushing John onto the bed. He took off his socks as she toed off her shoes.

Anna licked her lips and his eyes never left her as she reached for a package on the nightstand - he had brought a box for the weekend, and she certainly wouldn't complain. She pushed him into lying on his back, and he made himself comfortable right in the middle of the bed. They were completely naked now. She was aching for him.

She put the package between her teeth, placing her hands and knees on the bed and crawling towards him. She sat up at his thighs, straddling him, and his hands found their way to her backside, stroking, squeezing. She opened the package, reaching to stroke him once, twice - his erection stood proud and his breathing was heavy. Anna slid the condom down slowly, and crawled again towards him, so they could kiss. She loved the feeling of his hand in her hair, while his other stroked her lower back. They had enough experience with each other to know what the other liked - and she loved that he tried just as much as she did to make her happy. She rolled her hips, his erection trapped between their bodies and now touching a very sensitive part of hers. They both moaned - she at the sensation, and he could probably feel her wetness. She sat back again, reaching behind her for him, and he entered her.

He fit her so well, she vaguely wondered if perhaps her body wasn't made for him alone. She moved up and down, and he moved with her - his hands traveling her body masterfully. She splayed her hands on his chest and moved her neck so her hair wouldn't fall over her face; one of his hands massaged her breast, and his fingers pinched her nipple. She cried out at the sensation, biting her lip - she hoped the walls were thick.

His movements grew faster and the friction was almost unbearable - in the best sense of the word. Perhaps it was angle, or his touches, or the way his eyes were on her, but she squirmed on top of him, unable to control the feeling, the sensation blowing her mind, still new to her, somehow. She collapsed on top of him, but he was still hard inside her, and she felt him gently rolling them over so he was on top now. His thrusts were more precise now that he had control, but Anna's legs were still relaxed, open for him. He grabbed one of them and held her knee on the inside of his elbow, changing their angle slightly, still moving in and out of her. She could feel the familiar feeling building up once again and kissed him.

"Anna," he breathed her name between their bodies, and she rested her head forcefully against the mattress when she felt his fingers touch her low, matching the rhythm of his hips. She let out a moan - the feeling was too much. "Again, darling. For me."

She was undone. His forehead rested against hers and she could feel their sweat mingling and hear the slackness of their movements. And then - bliss, again, and she couldn't keep her eyes away from him, her moans loud even against her own ears. He thrusted again, and once more, almost forcefully so, deliciously so, inside her, and his body was spent.

John managed to keep himself from falling into her, just ever so, and her breathing was still erratic, her legs slack against the mattress, his body between them. His back was sticky against her palms, and he shifted, slipping out of her and sitting up, but not before giving her a kiss. He let out a deep sigh and she watched as he ran a hand through his hair, looking away to give him a little privacy as he took the condom off. Her breathing was slower now, surer. She moved her legs, stretching them. John's hand touched her thigh.

"Are you alright?"

His voice was soft, so soft. She felt tears on the back of her eyes. But she nodded. "Yeah. Of course."

"I think I'll have a quick shower," he commented, standing up. "Do you want to, ah, join me?"

Anna never showered with clients. At least, not before tonight. But his tentative words were enough to convince her that this was always a silly rule anyway. She nodded, sitting up in bed.

"I'll just take off my make-up first," she told him, and he stood up.

She watched him as he walked towards the bathroom, even giving him a smile as he entered. She hugged her knees close and let out a shaky breath. It surprised her from the start how responsive her body was to him, but tonight was different. Tonight, the day they had shared, his smiles and his words... She was completely in love with him.

Yet another rule, one she had never even thought about, that they broke together.

Anna sat up, shifting on the bed. Her feet met the cold carpet and the darkened room felt welcoming. She could still smell sex in the air. She shook her head at how emotional she was becoming, and she realised she only had a little more than a day with him. She needed to make the most of that, no matter what.

She walked towards the bathroom.

* * *

He moved a pawn, which was now perilously close to her bishop. He looked up; Anna's eyes were focused on nothing in particular, rather just staring into the night. He had opened the curtains and they could see the stars from their spot in bed. The hotel was quiet. He felt as if they were the only people awake at this early hour.

"Anna," John called, not really wanting to disturb her, but they needed to continue the game.

Anna looked down at the chess set he had found in the closet after their shower; she was now wearing a rose coloured satin nightgown, a rather short one that left her legs exposed, and he was in a white undershirt and black boxers. She moved her bishop quickly. Even distracted, she seemed to be a more active player than him. Chess was never his forte.

"What were you thinking?" he asked nonchalantly.

"Just... About Downton," she said softly, shrugging. "It's been awhile since I was here. And it's nice being back. Seeing this place. The village, the trees."

"We can have lunch at the village tomorrow, if you'd like," he suggested.

Anna smiled. "That would be nice."

He moved his tower ahead. "Do you have any family in the area?"

John looked up at her; she was analysing the game. But she shook her head all the same. "No. But my parents used to live here. I lived here until I was 21. That was... 6 years ago."

She was older than he thought she was. And that, somehow, comforted him.

He missed her turn, as she was looking at him expectantly now. He didn't know what piece she had moved, but he wouldn't ask.

"That was the last time you were here?"

Anna shook her head. "No, that was about 2 years ago. When my mother... When my mother died. I came to arrange everything."

He wasn't sure what he had expected, but it wasn't this. His eyes widened and he felt guilty for bringing her here, when she had no reason to return to this place.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I shouldn't have brought you here."

But Anna smiled. "It's okay. I'm tougher than I look," she told him, and he didn't doubt that. "She was very sick, and I was with her when it happened. It wasn't a shock. It was sad, but expected."

He scratched his head, and moved another pawn.

"Just... I didn't want come back before because the last time I was here, I wasn't... I wasn't who I am now," she continued, not looking at him. He understood her meaning. "But it's nice to come back. It's been good for me, I think."

She killed his queen, but he didn't mind too much; his thoughts were on her alone. "How did you enter this business, Anna?"

Their eyes locked. She blinked. He was about to apologise for asking when she spoke.

"I was a waitress, in London," she started, "and I had a scholarship. But Mum got sick, and I had to stop studying to care for her. It wasn't easy, but we were living well enough. When she died, everything got out of control. She had never legally married her second husband and they had some bad investments. We were... Completely broke. I was left with nothing but debts. I didn't know what to do. A bloke I knew from here offered me money, he had a business in London. I thought it was a model agency. Something like that."

"But it wasn't," he commented.

Anna shook her head. "I went back to London but my scholarship was gone, and I had no money or job. He wanted me to pay him, and I accepted the offer to work for him. As an escort. I learned soon afterwards that most men didn't want only an escort," she sighed, leaning against the headboard. "It was awful - the first few times. But I guess it got easier."

"I'm sorry," he pursed his lips. He didn't want to think of Anna dealing with all this - and he was just as guilty, for paying her for all these visits.

"It's okay. We're all stuck with the choices we make," she continued. "I have freedom to make my own rules, and that's not too bad."

He moved his bishop again. "Rules?"

Anna sighed. "There aren't many, but it's enough for me. I don't... do it without protection. And I offer regular stuff. Anything slightly unusual isn't for me."

John nodded in understanding. Anna got his bishop now. He looked at her - young, beautiful, but with a darker life than most. He was amazed at how much she still shone, at how much light she could give people. Their gaze met. Her light blue eyes could read into his soul, he was sure of it.

"I had never been with a... You were my first. That night," he commented. "I was going to send you home. That was the plan."

"Why didn't you?"

"I don't know," he said honestly. "You showed up and you were... You were different than I expected. Something stopped me, I'm not sure what. You're beautiful, and I was attracted to you. I know I should have sent you home, but-"

"Don't blame yourself," her voice startled him. "I have my internship, and I'm almost done with school. In a couple months I'll be done with all this. And being with you... It doesn't feel like a job to me."

He was speechless. Anna's eyes focused on the chessboard. His mouth felt dry. He let out a shaky breath and moved his king. He watched as Anna pursed her lips and locked her eyes with his. She wasn't as much of a mystery now, but at the same time she was another one, a new one. And he suddenly wanted to know even more of her - of her life, of her hobbies, what she liked to do. He couldn't pretend this was just business anymore; it wasn't.

He was in love with her.

"Check mate," Anna said quietly. Her queen had moved straight to his king.

She gave him a triumphant smile, the connection lost now. He shrugged and congratulated her, as they stored the pieces together in the box. They were quiet and talked of nothings as he took the box back to its place and joined Anna in bed again. He kissed her and congratulated her again, and she smiled. Neither slept until some time later, but they remained in bed, legs intertwined and bodies close, sharing the same air and lacing their fingers together again and again.

They both knew she had won more than just the game.


	7. VII

**A/N:** It's the end of their weekend - and some things can surprise Anna, not all in a good way. Please bear with me! First and fourth sections are M-rated, but I wouldn't miss them as they're very important. Would absolutely love to know your thoughts - and I hope all these mature scenes aren't being the same old boring thing every time!

* * *

VII.

John applied some lotion on his face and took a look in the mirror - he thought he didn't look too bad this morning, but best to keep presentable. As the foam began to form on his face, he wondered if Anna would like it if he sported a beard; he didn't think they had ever been together when he had more than a day's stubble. A small smile crossed his face as he went over their morning so far - it was almost noon now, and they had had a hearty breakfast a couple of hours earlier only to fall back into bed and enjoy over an hour of certain... Activities. He couldn't help it; when he thought he needed a rest, one look at Anna and he was ready again.

He began to shave, slowly but with practice, and just then Anna appeared on the doorway, cheeks still red from their previous engagement and eyes slightly glazed. He gave her a smile and she entered the bathroom, letting out a little sigh before sitting on the long bathroom counter, just beside the sink. She borrowed his white shirt he had worn the night before, though only a couple of buttons were buttoned, whilst the top ones were very much showing a big part of her chest - teasing him.

"What is it?" he asked as she swayed her legs, letting out a yawn.

"I just thought I'd keep you company," she answered simply, giving him a smile and scratching the skin between her breasts, which was slightly red now - probably his fault. "Did you ever cut yourself?"

"Only when I was a boy," John said with a chuckle. Anna watched him with interest.

Anna tilted her head. "I'd like to see you with a stubble. It must look nice."

John smiled. "I'll try to grow one for our next time together, then," he commented, and she broke his gaze; he did not understand. Half his face was done. He washed the razor once more and offered it to her. "Want to try it?"

Anna arched her eyebrows in surprise. "Me?"

"Who else?"

She picked the razor, and he stepped in front of her, between her legs. Her right hand reached for his chin, and he could see she let out a shaky breath. It was quite surprising, the dynamic they had - he felt as if they learned something new every day. It broke his heart how Anna seemed so experienced in some areas whilst she struggled to grasp some intimacy - intimacy that would creep up between them when they least expected, such as moments like these.

"Do you trust me?" she half joked, the razor on his cheek.

"Intimately," he said, and he meant it.

Her touch was light and precise, asking for directions at first but quickly getting the hang of it. He watched as she moved in front of him - her slow breathing, her silky skin. He could see her belly button from his position above her and that mesmerized him. His hands were on her thighs, just because. He stroked the skin there.

"Don't distract me," she mumbled, giving him a mock hard look.

"I'm not," he said.

Anna laughed. "Yes, you are," she moved the razor in a different angle, her eyes settled on the task at hand.

"I can't help it," John revealed, moving one hand up and unbuttoning the first button he encountered. "You look way too tempting wearing my clothes."

"They are comfortable," she defended herself, "and I like that they smell like you."

He smiled, one of his hands traveling up on her thigh; he couldn't find any underwear. He groaned; it seemed almost surreal. Twenty minutes ago, he had been inside her. And now, he already ached to see the sweet expression on her face when he gave her pleasure. It was far too soon for his body to get ready for something, but he was quite sure he could entice such a reaction from her. Another button was unbuttoned. Only one left. The movement left a nipple uncovered.

Anna put the razor away, resting it on the sink, and reached for a towel. "There, I think it's all done."

He accepted the towel, and took a look in the mirror behind her. He nodded in approval; it looked perfect. Anna's palm stroked his cheek.

"It's smooth," she commented.

"You do it better than me already," he said, his hands reaching behind her and bringing her closer. She came willingly, relaxed in his arms. Her lips were still red from kissing - she looked beautiful. He caught them in a slow kiss, whilst his hand worked on freeing the one button left.

"What are you up to?" Anna asked lazily when he released her lips, kissing her jaw instead. The open shirt now revealed her deliciously nude body. He stopped to watch her for a moment before resting his hands on her hips.

"Nothing," he lied, leaning down to catch one of her nipples in his mouth, lightly between his teeth. She let out a shaky breath, one of her hands grasping at his hair.

He caught her other breast in his hand, massaging it. He hadn't had enough time to cherish her - their activities suddenly rushed when she was in control. He wanted to explore her, properly, as best as he could. He might as well start now.

He moved his free hand between her leg, lightly touching the skin there. Anna's grasp on him turned tighter. He pinched a nipple between his fingers, and with his other hand parted her folds. Her hips unconsciously shifted, offering herself to him. My god, she was wet. He ran a hand over her, up and down, leaving her moist all over. She let out a sweet moan against his ear, and he pulled away from her breast, wanting to look at her face. His middle finger began to massage her down, slowly. She was still swollen from their previous encounter, but he could tell she wanted more.

He kissed her lips, and moved his hand, slipping two fingers inside her. Anna moaned. He moved his thumb against her sensitive skin, his fingers moving in and out. She bit her lip, squirming beneath him. One of her hands roughly stroked his chest, while the other dug at his shoulder. He didn't stop his movements.

"John," she hissed, throwing her head back. He had never heard a sweeter sound before. " _Oh_."

Her moans turned more urgent and he felt her clenching around his fingers, her eyes dark and hazy, and he never wanted to forget that. She clung to him, and he stilled his movements, pulling his fingers out of her soon, stroking her lightly there, leaving a wet trace of herself on her skin. Beautiful.

Her breathing was hard, but she pulled him even closer, opening her lips to give him a deep, slow kiss. His arms embraced her slim waist close.

"What was that for?" Anna said when she pulled away, their faces mere inches from each other.

He grinned. "I want to make you happy."

She smiled, and kissed him again.

He had said the right thing, then.

* * *

John smiled as Robert talked animatedly of the plans for a new hotel in London and the opening of another in Scotland; the group was going fairly well, and John was glad that he could be considered part of it. Robert had given him the best chance of his life when he was offered the job; after the divorce, it was the one thing that kept him going, even if he felt as if his life had been in a state of limbo until a few weeks ago. Until Anna.

She was talking to Mary, wearing that lovely white dress they bought the previous day. Had it really only been two days since he picked her up in London? It felt like so much more - it felt like an eternity. Or perhaps too short altogether; he couldn't believe tomorrow they would go back.

He wasn't too excited about that. He wasn't sure how, but he had to tell Anna that he didn't want to be her client anymore. Things were too deep - he would understand if she didn't want him. He was older, of course. And he knew he should be careful. He was well off, and she needed money. But he knew her. He trusted her. It was more than sex, more than chemistry even. He had never felt like this before.

"We're booked until January," Robert's voice shook him out of his reverie. "Not bad for a Yorkshire hotel, huh?"

"No," John agreed, "not bad at all."

Anna's eyes met his. She smiled, a smile that belonged only to him. He knew it. He replied her with one of his own.

"She's lovely, by the way. Your companion," Robert commented. "How the hell did you meet her? Mary tells me she works for an accounting company."

John nodded; Anna hadn't lied. "We had some mutual acquaintances."

"I'm not sure for how long this has been going on but I can tell you she's crazy about you," Robert took a sip of the champagne.

John took his eyes off Anna and looked at his friend. "Really?"

Robert made a face. "Absolutely! Don't you think I noticed how quick you were to leave the gala yesterday? She couldn't take her eyes off you. And I'd say it's a mutual thing."

John shook his head in disbelief, looking at Anna again. Their eyes met for just a second before she looked away.

"And Mary liked her," Robert noted. "Cora did too, but you know how difficult Mary is."

John nodded, though his eyes found someone else's - and he frowned, before the person in question looked away, talking to someone else. How odd. Robert was still talking of Mary and Anna, though John wasn't particularly listening anymore.

"What's Carlisle doing here?"

"Oh, you know," Robert shrugged, "business. The board still hasn't decided if we should accept the offer of a partnership for that hotel in London. I haven't talked much to him - there's something I don't like about him, but I don't know what. It's probably nothing."

John nodded. He had voted against the partnership.

"You don't like him," Robert said. It wasn't a question.

"I think he does his business in a different way than we do," John drank the remaining champagne in his glass. "And while I'm all for trying new things, I think we should stick to our way in this case."

* * *

Anna found herself alone as the garden party slowly faded and the day came to an end. She spent most of the time with John and later with Mary and Elsie, and had a very fun conversation with Tom Branson regarding certain Irish habits. She was sure John would want to leave soon, considering some people were already leaving, and she thought she heard Robert inviting them for dinner at one of the Abbey's restaurants later tonight.

She would have to ask John when would they leave the next day. She had to make sure she was all packed and she hoped she wouldn't leave anything behind. They had had such a lovely day - after such a lazy morning, they strolled around the village and she even ran into a girl she went to school with. They had lunch at the pub and walked back towards the Abbey, making the most of such a lovely sunny day.

She never wanted it to end.

But time was ticking, and as much as she didn't want to think about it, she had to. They had tonight - and only tonight. Tomorrow, everything would be different. Everything would have to be different.

She declined the waiter's offer for some sweet macaroni and champagne, and her eyes found John, standing, talking to a man she didn't know. His eyes weren't friendly - he looked angry. The man he was talking to turned - he was tall and blonde, and his eyes found hers. She looked away, feeling a little intimidated - were they talking of her? It couldn't be. She didn't know anyone in this party.

When Anna looked back, John was talking to Robert again, still not with a very friendly expression, and the man was walking away. She realised she still had some champagne left in her glass on the table and reached for it, drinking the rest. The man was walking towards her. She didn't know him - but he looked vaguely familiar. She stood up, hoping to catch John's attention. When she looked into the man's eyes, she remembered.

The man with blue eyes. At the hotel, on her first night with John.

"I've spoken to your man," the man said, in a calming but odd tone. "I must say, it's a surprise to see you here."

"Likewise."

"Your presence here is a good asset for me, though," he continued. "When your boss called me to let me know Bates had accepted you, I was surprised. But I did not know he would like you so much."

She didn't like the mention of Thomas.

"How's that a good thing for you?" Anna asked.

"You see, Bates had voted against our partnership," the man explained. "But now he'll have to vote differently, considering he won't want his name associated with a prostitute. But I must say, you are playing your part very well."

Anna frowned.

"He seems more interested in making sure no one knows about your true job than making sure he isn't ruined," the man shook his head. "You'd think he would know what a whore you are."

Anna gulped, staring at her feet. The tears stung in the back of her eyes.

"And imagine how that would be to the Crawleys and the Grantham corporation," the man let out a fake sigh. "To be linked to one of London's best prostitution agencies. It would ruin their reputation," Anna looked up at him then. "So I thank you, love. Your boss did mention you were the best for this business transaction."

"Is there a problem here?" John's voice startled her. "I believe we're already spoken enough today, Richard."

"I was just talking to my business associate," the man named Richard said, stepping away from her. "I'll leave you be. Thank you again, Anna."

She didn't care how he knew her name. She felt used - manipulated, even. She couldn't let John deal with the consequences - his business would be affected, and if they kept seeing each other, it would be even more so. She knew they would have to end things soon but - this only made it more real. She felt John's hand against hers and took a sharp breath, before looking up at him.

"Let's go, shall we?" he asked, softly.

Anna could only nod.

* * *

The walk to their bedroom was made in silence, a silence too loud for Anna to understand anything else. They opted for the stairs, so they didn't have to wait for the lift, and before long they entered the bedroom - their safe haven since yesterday, her dream come true. They parted ways the moment they arrived; John sat on the comfortable sofa beside the door. Anna stood by the mirror.

"What did he tell you?" John asked.

Anna ran a hand through her hair. "He said enough. I'm... I'm sorry, John."

He shook his head. "I think we were both pawns in this game, Anna."

She nodded, closing her eyes. She knew what she had to do. "I think I should go."

"Where?" he frowned.

"Back to London," Anna said weakly. "We can't... We shouldn't see each other anymore, John."

Her words stabbed her heart as well as his, she was sure of that. He didn't speak immediately; he just stared. A tear escaped her eye and she wiped it away quickly.

"Have I... Was it something I did?" was his question. She shook her head; she could almost feel her heart breaking. "Was it something I said?"

"No," she said quickly, walking towards him, sitting on the bed across from him. "You were perfect, you are... But I can't see you anymore. I can't go back to London and see you again. I can't make you lose your job because of me."

"I won't lose my job. Richard doesn't have that power over me," John shook her head. "One word to Robert and this is never leaving this place. I won't give in to Richard."

"But then you'll have to tell him the truth," Anna said. "You'll be associated with my kind."

"It is not your kind, Anna," John closed his eyes. "You're not... You're Anna to me. You shouldn't worry about my job."

"But I'm... I'm a whore, John," her voice broke. "I'm a prostitute. I'm worth nothing. You shouldn't risk your whole life because of this."

"Don't talk like that, Anna," he said forcefully. "Don't say that about yourself. Ever again."

Anna nodded. The tears were flowing freely now; she couldn't contain them anymore. "It is the truth. And I can't bear the thought of anything happening to you. Even if you handle this, if we keep seeing each other... Thomas, he'll..."

"Who's Thomas?"

Anna was still shaking her head. "He's said that if we keep seeing each other, he will... I don't know, I can't bear the thought of anything happening-"

"Don't worry about me, Anna, I can manage this."

"But of course I worry!" Anna said, her voice loud and clear. "I can't not worry, this is... I love you, I won't let this business ruin you!"

He didn't reply, and realization dawned her at what she just confessed. She wiped the tears away, unable to face him. This was it - this changed everything. John was still silent. This was a mess, she knew it. It wasn't how she planned this would go at all.

"You were always more than a client to me," the words left her before she could contain them. "Right from the first night. And that's why... That's why I can't see you anymore. I can't do this to you. You deserve... A proper lady. Someone who understands you."

He surprised her by reaching for her hands.

"You are a lady to me. A fine one," John said. He said it with such confidence, such care. "Let me help you. Please. I can help you with this... Thomas. I can pay him for you. You don't have to work for him anymore."

Anna shook her head; that was unacceptable. It was what got her in this mess to begin with. Not that she didn't trust John; she did, with all her life and all her heart. But she wouldn't bring him into this and she needed to fix it on her own. As hard as it was - how long it might take.

"It's not like that. It's _my_ debt," she told him over her tears. "And Thomas, he's not like that. He doesn't let go gently. He would go after me, and he would go after you, and I can't bear to think... I can't let this happen, to either of us."

"I don't care about what he can do."

"He could ruin you. He can ruin both of us," Anna told him - he had to understand. "He has people everywhere, connections. He can ruin your career, he can ruin my life."

"So for that you would let this go?" John asked. Anna stopped breathing. "You would let go of your happiness because of him? I don't care about my job, I... We shouldn't have to let this go because of his threats."

"But if he ruins you-"

"Forget about me, Anna," he shook her hands. "What about you?"

She sobbed - and thought of all the things Thomas could do. All that he could plan, all that he could do against her, her internship and her studies. She shook her head.

"The only ruin that I'd recognise is to be without you," she half-sobbed, with the most honesty she could manage. "But it's not like that. There's so much more to consider..."

"Come with me," he pleaded, "to Ireland. We can leave tomorrow if you want. Straight to Ireland. Live with me."

Anna sniffed, frowning. "What?"

"I love you," John breathed. She couldn't believe her own ears. "I love you. And I don't care that you're in this business, I care that you're with me. I don't want... I don't want to share you anymore, Anna. You shouldn't have to be shared. You should make your own choices, pursue better opportunities. Please, let me help you. Please."

His words struck a chord on her, and she let go of his hands, covering her eyes. She didn't want to be shared - she didn't want anyone else. But it wasn't as simple as he thought, it wasn't as easy as it seemed. But he, John Bates, he... Loved her.

"Anna," she felt his soft hand on her cheek. "I don't want you to do this because of me. I want you to do this because of you. I want you to be happy. No matter what. Even if it's not with me..."

"The only happiness I know is when I'm with you," she confessed. "I love you. I love you so much, and pretending that I don't has been killing me."

"I know," he said, and she knew he understood. "I feel as if I only live when I'm with you."

She let out a shaky breath, holding his hand on her cheek. She kissed his palm. She was still crying, but she wasn't sure why anymore. His face was close - his eyes soft and understanding and now she knew what she had been seeing behind them this whole time.

Love.

Their lips met.

His words were true; she only felt alive when he was with her. Their movements were slow, careful. His hands were soft against her hair, the buttons of his shirt were freed with care and practice. She needed to feel him against her, she needed to feel him close. His hands trembled when he reached for the hem of her dress, and she helped him take it off. They only stopped kissing for breathing, or for muttering simple words, with so much significance.

 _I_ _love_ _you_.

 _I_ _don't_ _want_ _to_ _be_ _without_ _you_.

His arms embraced her and they lay on the bed together, him on top of her. Their breaths mingled. Their kisses became fast and raw. His hands touched her as if she was made of porcelain, but in the best possible way. He took off her heels and kissed her jaw, her collarbone, the valley between her breasts. She unclipped her bra, and he helped her take it off. For the first time, she let him set the pace. He kissed her belly button and his hands pulled at her knickers. She was entirely at his mercy.

He kissed her low, slowly, tentative. She opened her legs wider. She had never experienced this before, with any men. His tongue moved masterfully against her and soon she was undone, grasping at his hair and squirming her hips under him. He held her in place all the while, slowly coming up, kissing her lips. She tasted him and herself in his kiss, and he settled between her legs. She wanted him closer - she needed him closer.

John pulled away to unbuckle his belt and take off his trousers, and when he leaned down she eagerly kissed his lips again and again, rolling her hips against him.

Sweat already formed on his forehead and he kissed the corner of her mouth, supporting himself on his elbow, beside her head. His palm caressed her temple, her cheek and her jaw. Their breathing was hard. She could feel his tip at her entrance and moved again. But John blinked.

"We need protection," he mumbled.

Anna let out a deep breath. "We're safe. I _need_ you."

They became one.

And as they moved, and Anna felt his hot skin against her, she vaguely thought - this wasn't sex. But it was her first time making love.

* * *

In the beginning, it was hopeless. Then, it was resolved. Now... It was unpredictable.

They never left for dinner afterwards. They stayed in, talking, discovering, feeling. After some time, their stomachs grumbled and they ordered room service. They made love one more time, shared a shower, and fell asleep together, their bodies pressed close. They didn't make plans. They just lived.

And just then, it was enough. But not now. Not anymore.

Anna watched as John slept. His expression was a peaceful one, and she wondered if he was dreaming. Her fingers traced his skin, from his forehead to his lips. They were sharing the same pillow. She nuzzled her nose against his and he smiled in his sleep. The sun was rising, enveloping the bedroom in a golden light. It felt like a new start, a fresh start. He gave her the chance to dream.

But some things she would have to do alone. She couldn't let him interfere where she should have acted so long ago. She couldn't know how accepting he would be of this decision, but she knew he needed time to think things through, same as she did. But of this she was sure of: she needed to resolve certain things on her own. She needed to at least try.

Then, she would let herself dream.

She slipped off the bed, careful not to wake him. Most of her clothes were packed; she took a few minutes in the bathroom to get ready and dressed herself for the trip back. She decided to leave the dresses he bought her behind, and prepared only her sole suitcase. It was quiet outside. John was lying on his back, the sheets pooled at his waist. Her eyes filled with tears, and she took a paper from the little desk by the fireplace and wrote a note for him. She closed the curtains - she didn't want him to wake up and try to stop her.

She gave him a soft kiss, barely even touching his lips.

"I love you," it was a whisper, but it meant the world.

She left the room.

She still had tears on her eyes when she reached the lobby and asked for a taxi. The receptionist was polite enough to leave her alone. She didn't see any guests while downstairs. Before long, the car arrived. When she got in, never bothering on putting her suitcase in the trunk, the driver asked for her destination.

"The train station, please," was her weak tone.

And just like that, she left Downton Abbey and John Bates behind.

* * *

 _*Shaving scene borrowed from an episode of CSI I watched many years ago... I just couldn't waste the opportunity of having John say he trusts Anna intimately here. ;)_

 _Perhaps, with encouragement, I can update sooner rather than later, and end this little cliffhanger..._


	8. VIII

**A/N:** Let's see what happens when John wakes up, shall we? ;)

* * *

VIII.

John woke up groggily, and the room was still dark. He remembered the night before; glimpses, as if it was a dream. Then, the complete memories. Anna - her cries, her kisses. He wanted to end her agony. He wanted to end his, too. He blinked, feeling the bed terribly cold, and realised Anna wasn't there. He heard movement - in the corridor, perhaps. The bathroom door was closed; Anna was probably there. He rubbed his eyes tiredly and sat up; he hadn't bothered to put on underwear the night before. He remembered falling asleep with her surrounding him, her naked body pressed close to his. The sheets pooled at his hips and he yawned, shifting to see the time; it was a quarter past ten. They spent most of the night awake, and in result of that, he overslept. He slowly stood up, carefully peeking through the curtains. It was a cloudy morning.

"Anna?" he called. His stomach grumbled. They needed to talk about what they would do today.

The silence made him frown, and he walked towards the bathroom door. He knocked twice.

"Anna, are you there?"

Silence again. He turned the doorknob. The door opened with a click, and the bathroom was dark and empty. It couldn't be.

He looked around aimlessly - his clothes had been folded carefully and were now on the settee. Only his clothes. Not Anna's. He crossed the room towards the closet. Only his suitcase, and the dresses were there. Anna was gone.

His mind was spiraling and he reached for his cell phone on the desk; there was a text message from Robert but he didn't bother reading it. He dialed Anna's number from memory. Just as the voice told him the number he was trying to reach was unavailable, his eyes noticed the piece of paper on top of a pillow - her pillow. His mouth was dry.

He picked it up.

 _"I think we both need some time to figure things out on our own. Please let me try._

 _I love you._

 _Anna"_

His eyes widened. It couldn't be - after their conversation, she still wanted to deal with things on her own. His heart raced. The silence of the room echoed in his ears - she was really gone. He paced around the bedroom, the note in his hand. She wanted time to think about things. He understood that. He shouldn't assume she would simply throw everything into air and go with him. But he wouldn't let her continue living her life this way; she deserved better.

He reached for his phone again and dialed her number once more, fully intending to ring her. When had she left? Perhaps she was still at the station. He needed to check, just in case.

 _"The number you've reached is currently unavailable. Please-"_

"Damn it, Anna," he mumbled, tossing the phone onto the settee. He sat on the bed dejectedly. He could go to the station, he knew that. But she wanted him to let her try. She wanted time to figure things out. He didn't need time, he needed her. But if she wanted time, he would give it to her. At least for now.

Meanwhile, he could work on dealing with his own problems today. His eyes were burning as he read the note once more. He realised he had never seen her handwriting before. It was neat and pretty - just like her. He rubbed his eyes tiredly and thought of the day ahead of him. A day without Anna.

He had a lot to do.

* * *

Anna had just arrived at King's Cross by the time John had read her note. She had managed a ticket to York soon, and the train to London was due to leave in just five minutes when she arrived. She rushed to get it, and only when she was leaving Yorkshire behind, looking out the window of the moving train, she had time to think of everything.

A little over two hours later, she arrived in London with puffy eyes and sorrow in her heart. But it was for the best. She had to try to work things out on her own - at least take Thomas out of the equation. She knew it wouldn't be easy, but she had to try it.

Still, nothing could have prepared her for the emptiness she felt when she entered her flat and found it all exactly the same way she had left it. It was as if her weekend with John had never existed - as if their time together had only happened in a dream. She didn't think she had any more tears to shed, but as she carried her suitcase down the narrow corridor and saw little Charlie playing on the living room rug, the smell of Ethel's cooking filling the air and her bedroom door open - revealing her single bed and neat desk. It was as if she had never left.

"Anna, is that you?" Ethel showed up from the little kitchen, stopping halfway when she took a look at her friend.

Anna knew she couldn't be a good sight right now; she hadn't had the taken the time to put on any make-up this morning, and she knew her hair was a mess and there were tears on her face.

"Yeah, I... I decided to come home early," she said weakly, and her voice broke. "I took a train home."

"Oh, Anna," Ethel said, wiping her hands on her apron and approaching her carefully. "I'm sorry."

Anna accepted her hug, because she didn't have the heart to say anything else. In that moment, Ethel was the friend she needed - more than anything. Anna told her what happened, John's offer and where they were standing. And as she told Ethel, Anna thought she felt a glimmer of hope build inside her. They had to do this. She could do this, and then... Then they could plan together, properly. Like any couple could.

Minutes later, she went to her bedroom, leaving her suitcase in a corner and wiping her tears with the back of her hands. She opened the curtains and the window, even though it was raining. It felt comfortable to her. She needed to think of how she would start this.

She picked up her phone and turned it on; it only took a moment for it to receive a message, and she knew who it was from before even reading it. But the screen flashed with his name and her heart took a leap in her chest.

 _"Please let me know if you got home safely. X"_

The lack of names or emotion didn't discourage her; she owed him the truth. Of course he was up by now, probably worrying about her. She would never lie to John. But she hoped he understood.

 _"I'm home, safe. Thank you - I love you. X"_

His next message came only a moment later, and a watery smile crossed her features. A single tear escaped her eyes as she read it, over and over again.

 _"I love you too."_

She failed to notice a shadowy figure watching her from the pavement below, hidden under an umbrella.

* * *

John watched as Robert took in his words; he knew it wasn't an easy thing to understand and even if Anna worried, what he did in his free time wouldn't make him lose his job. Prostitution wasn't illegal, even though it wasn't moral either, but he and Anna never engaged in such activities while he was supposed to be working.

John looked at the garden around them; they had arranged to have a quick lunch together before he headed back to London. Luckily, Robert came unaccompanied, as Cora and the girls wanted to go shopping, and when he asked of Anna, John didn't lie. It was best to have this over with. If she wanted time to solve things on her own, he would give it to her - and he would make wise use of his time as well.

"You know I won't sack you," Robert said after a moment. "This is a shock, though. You, of all people... And you met at one of our hotels."

John nodded. "We did."

"Of course it is hardly enough for a scandal, if that's what Carlisle says," Robert continued, taking a sip of his wine. "You weren't working when it happened. The main issue would be your reputation here. People saw you with her."

"Carlisle used this to make me accept the partnership, which I won't. My vote remains negative. He had no right to involve Anna," John explained. "Everyone thought we were in a relationship."

"Which you are not."

"We would like to be," John said quickly. His pulse was racing, and he took a deep breath. "It wasn't just... It wasn't just pleasure, Robert. I love her."

Robert pursed his lips, deep in thought, and nodded. "Does she love you?"

John nodded, wordlessly.

"Are you sure she isn't just trying to get to you?" Robert asked. "You're well off, you have a good position, you have a terrific place in Ireland. Are you sure she isn't tricking you?"

John shook his head. "That's not how she is. She intended to leave after the garden party. Intended to end everything between us. Someone has been threatening her, with me. I'm not sure who or with what, but I'll find out."

"She's a prostitute, John," Robert insisted. "Be reasonable, think about this. She isn't the right woman for you."

John could understand Robert's reticence, but he wouldn't tolerate it, not about Anna. He didn't doubt her. And he was thinking clearly.

"And Vera was?" John asked. "Anna is different. We may have started on the wrong foot, but I believe we can make it right."

Robert sighed. "Alright. We'll keep this between us, and I'll deal with Carlisle. Just... Make sure you know what you're doing."

John nodded; they stopped talking for a moment just so the waiter brought over their orders, and as they started to eat, Robert spoke.

"I don't mean to accuse Anna. I stand by what I said yesterday," he said quietly. "She couldn't take her eyes off you. And if we think about it, a woman's touch could do wonders for that place of yours in Dublin. Like bring in some decoration. And a new couch."

John frowned, though a small smile crossed his lips. "What's wrong with my couch?"

"For starters, you can barely sit on it," Robert stated, indignantly, but sobered up quickly. "I wish you all the happiness, you know that."

"I know that," John nodded, patting his friend's shoulder affectionately. "Thank you for the vow of trust."

"Bates, if there ever comes a day when I won't trust you, I don't think I'll trust anyone else."

* * *

He had looked everywhere. Every agency, every ad. But without a full name and the name of the agency, there was nothing he could do.

He stopped the car in front of the building, unsure of what to do. Robert had been kind enough to spare him a couple of days and Tom could run the Dublin office with no problem. John didn't want to do anything without Anna knowing, but he needed to speak to her, to know if she had a plan. He had called her earlier but her phone was unavailable. Thus, that was how he had come to stand by her apartment building on Tuesday morning. He felt nervous - he didn't want to intrude or to show up unannounced, but he had to do that. He had to see her.

He opened the door slowly, and crossed the street, and just then he realised he didn't know the number of her flat. A young woman was opening the door when he walked up the steps, and he let out a deep breath; there were too many choices, and he couldn't very well know which one was hers.

"Excuse me," he said quickly, and the young woman, who had just unlocked the door, looked at him suspiciously. "I don't mean to disturb you but do you know where Anna Smith lives?"

The young woman's mouth opened slightly and her dark eyes watched him closely. Her ginger hair was a little disheveled and she didn't look like she had slept much. "Who wants to know?"

"I'm her... I'm John Bates," he said carefully. "I've tried ringing her but her phone seems to be off."

The young woman nodded, and he thought her features softened. "It was dead this morning when she left. She may not have had a chance to charge it yet. But I don't think she'll be long. You can wait upstairs if you'd like."

John arched his eyebrows. "So you know her?"

The young woman opened the door further and stepped into the building, allowing him to follow her. "I'm her flat mate. My name's Ethel. She's told me about you."

He followed Ethel up the stairs and into the corridor, where they entered on the first door to the left. He didn't take off his jacket and he felt awkward as Ethel kept walking with her bags. He followed her into the living room; the flat was small and simple, but cozy. There were many books on the wall shelves and he wondered if those were Anna's.

Ethel came back a moment later, having put her bags in the kitchen, and she sat on a comfortable looking chair, gesturing for him to take a seat on the couch. He did so, though he felt her watching him the entire time.

"You're not what I expected," she said after a moment. When his eyes questioned her, she kept talking. "I don't know. Anna doesn't really say much."

John smiled. "How has she been? We haven't talked properly since Saturday."

Ethel narrowed her eyes, clearly unsure of what to say. He grew anxious. "I think we should wait for her to tell you."

"But she's alright, isn't she?" he asked quickly. "She isn't hurt. This Thomas guy-"

"You know about Thomas?" Ethel frowned. John nodded, still expecting an answer. "She's fine, don't worry. I'm just surprised she's told you about him," she took a deep breath. "He isn't letting her go easily."

John nodded. "I know."

"No, you don't. She's told him she's done," Ethel stated seriously. "She wants to pay him without working for him. He didn't accept it but Anna was adamant... So now he's done with his threats. He wants his money."

John's fist clenched on his knee. "But Anna can't pay him yet."

"No. I think she had some savings, not much, just for emergencies, and she's used all she had," Ethel sighed. "Thomas is shady. He doesn't want to lose her, so he's using his knowledge to make her come back to the agency."

John frowned. "What do you mean?"

"She lost her internship," Ethel said simply. "Yesterday afternoon. He told her boss, so she was dismissed after her lunch break."

He felt his blood rushing in his ears as he heard the words; Anna valued her studies and her internship, and Thomas took that from her. He wasn't sure what her plan was, but she wouldn't be able to pay Thomas what she owed with no job, no matter how much she had saved. And now, more than ever, he knew she didn't want to do that job again. He couldn't let this Thomas, whoever he was, take Anna again.

"Where is Anna?" he asked, his tone calm and controlled.

"She went to the university. Her internship was vinculated to them and she needs to end it," Ethel explained. "She said she'd be back for lunch, so…"

"Where can I find Thomas?"

Ethel's eyes widened. "No. No, Anna wouldn't want you talking to Thomas."

"I mean to help. I won't confront him," John insisted. "Please. You know Anna will never let me pay the rest of her debt. And this man won't stop until he's got his money."

"You won't get into trouble?" Ethel asked, pursing her lips. "Anna would kill me if she knew-"

"You don't have to tell her I've been here. I can do that," he pleaded. "Where can I find Thomas?"

He could see she was torn, but he had to try it. After a moment of hesitation, she closed her eyes and spoke.

"The Elite Agency," she said, "on Elephant & Castle. His name's Thomas Barrow. But they won't let you see him unless you've got an appointment."

"I'll schedule one if I have to," John said, standing up.

"You're going now?" Ethel asked, surprised. "What do I tell Anna?"

John started walking towards the door, Ethel following him.

"Will she be home this afternoon?" he asked.

"Yeah, I think so," Ethel replied.

"I'll see her then," he told her simply, and opened the door.

He barely heard Ethel's good luck wish as he quickly walked down the stairs and out of the building. He was in the car as fast as possible, and paused only to search for the agency's address on his phone, but he could not find it. Their website only showed girls - many of them - and a phone for contact. He quickly rang it.

"Elite Agency, how can I help you?"

The woman's voice reached his ears and he was unsure of what to say for a moment. Before she could speak again, however, he recovered.

"I'd like to schedule an appointment with Thomas Barrow," John said quietly. "For today."

"Mr Barrow is unavailable today, I'm afraid," the woman said carefully. "Perhaps we could arrange a meeting for Thursday?"

"Actually, I'm only in town today. I'm an old client," he found himself saying. "It should be a quick meeting, by all means."

"I'll have to check with him. Please wait a second," the woman asked, and he heard nothing for a few more seconds. He tapped against the wheel impatiently. "I could fix you in for two this afternoon," she suggested.

"That's perfect," John said. "Thank you."

"If you could just give me your name, sir?"

"John Bates."

The call ended soon afterwards, and he hoped it would be as easy as this to face Thomas. Just as he was about to start the car, a figure turned the corner and crossed the street in front of him, arms tightly closed around herself as she faced the light rain without an umbrella. Anna looked beautiful, as ever; it didn't matter if she was wearing a stunning dress or grey clothes. He smiled to himself when he realised this was the first time he was seeing her in jeans, and she looked perfect - except for the sad, determined expression on her face. He swore she had seen him, just for a moment, when she looked twice at the car, but he doubted she could see much inside. His heart faltered as he watched her walk up the steps to her door and quickly enter the building. He wanted nothing more than to talk to her, touch her, make sure she was fine. But as much as he hated doing this before talking to her himself, he would help her on his own.

Or so he hoped.

* * *

"So what can I do for you, Mr Bates?"

John took a seat across Thomas' desk and studied him carefully. He supposed he should have felt a little more intimidated at the atmosphere - the agency's office was dark and minimalistic, and very well decorated. Thomas Barrow's office was big and luxurious, and John thought of Anna's little flat. He should have felt intimidated by this all, but he wasn't - he was a man on a mission. And that mission included Thomas Barrow.

He hadn't known what to expect, really - a bigger man, perhaps, more... Manly. But he could see how Thomas fit in with this job. He remembered Ethel's words and Anna's sobs - they were enough to remind him that this wasn't child's play.

"I must say, the receptionist mentioned you're an old client but I don't remember you," he continued. His office smelled of smoke and John noticed the well used ashtray on the desk.

"Would you remember me, Mr Barrow?" John asked.

Thomas blinked. "I think I would, Mr Bates," his suspicious eyes watched him closely. "What brings you here?"

John leaned forward slightly; best go straight to the point. "Anna Smith."

Thomas' expression didn't change - he barely moved a muscle. But John knew his words caught him by surprise. "What about her?"

"I understand she owes you money," John spoke. "I'm here to pay it."

"Anna is the only one who can pay her debt, and we had a deal that she would do that by working," Thomas said slowly. "So she can't run and hide from me. And she shouldn't send people to cover for her."

"She didn't send me. I came here to pay her debt and I will," John reached inside his pocket and took out a check. "How much is it?"

"That is not my agreement with Anna," he insisted. "If we do this, there will be consequences."

At this, John's blood boiled and he hovered over the desk, grabbing Thomas by his suit jacket. The man remained with an impassive expression on his face, and only slightly taken aback by the movement.

"Listen, you filthy rat," John said quietly, looking into the man's eyes, "prostitution may not be illegal, but pimping is, so is advertisement and blackmailing girls into doing what you want. I'm sure it won't take long for me to find enough witnesses and put your filthy agency down. So if you threaten Anna one more time, I'll do just that, and I'll want to see if you can try and stop me."

Thomas said nothing, and John released his hold on him, sitting back in his chair. Thomas readjusted his jacket and smoothed back his hair.

"How much, Mr Barrow?"

But Thomas simply stared at him with cold eyes, obviously trying to anticipate his next move or maybe even think of something else to say.

"Very well, Mr Bates," he said at last, half turning in his chair to open a drawer and grab a notebook from the inside. "If you insist."

"I do, Mr Barrow," John said sternly.

Thomas opened the notebook to a specific page and pointed the value to John - a little less than he expected even, and it made him angry - just how much of the money Anna gained in one night could actually stay with her? It seemed as if Thomas retained a large portion of it, if what Anna said about needing a few more months to be able to end her debt. John filled out the check carefully, and signed it. He tucked his wallet back inside his jacket and stood up, leaving the check on the desk.

"It's been a pleasure to do business with you, Mr Bates," Thomas said bitterly. "Perhaps not a pleasure to me, but I'm sure it was to you."

John didn't acknowledge his comment, and turned around to leave. But Thomas had other ideas.

"Never thought Anna would have it in her, to use a customer like that," he continued. "They are all whores in the end, Mr Bates, and this is no Pretty Woman. You remember that when you mourn the money you lost today."

John merely shook his head.

"Stay out of her life," he said gravely, "or I'll be back to ruin yours."

But he still heard Thomas' laughter as he closed the door behind him and walked into the corridor one more time - hopefully, for the last time.

* * *

 _A/N: I know, no scenes of them together but you'll be rewarded in chapter 9, I promise!_

 _Today is my birthday and reviews make me happy :)_


	9. IX

**A/N:** For some reason, I'm not being able to privately reply to reviews today - will do that soon! Thanks so much for all the birthday wishes and I'm glad the chapter was well-received, even if there were no A/B scenes! This one is the opposite, though - only A/B scenes! Would love to know your thoughts and hopes for the next chapter; one more and then we're done! Thanks so much for reading!

* * *

IX.

Anna looked around aimlessly as the door closed behind her, feeling relieved to be alone, but also a little empty somehow. Ethel decided to go out for a stroll with little Charlie and while Anna appreciated the invitation to join them, she couldn't bring herself to go outside. She longed to be alone today. She felt miserable and a little sad at the way things were going. But at least Thomas hadn't called since this morning.

She decided to prepare some tea, and turned the television on as she passed the living room. She wasn't sure how she would manage stuff. She didn't have much money saved now, not after she paid most of it to Thomas, and she still had to pay for her education and help with the rent - she might even have to move, or find another flatmate, as Ethel would be moving away soon. She wasn't sure how she would say this all to John; all her efforts so far turned things worse. She had tried to quit the job before, at least twice, but Thomas always made her go back. She could never stay away for long. And just the thought of working again, walking down those hotel corridors, let other men touch her... It was enough to make her sick.

Just then, there was a knock on the door. Anna frowned; perhaps Ethel had forgotten something. She walked out of the kitchen and into the narrow corridor that led to the door, and for a moment, before looking through the peephole, she worried that it might be Thomas. He knew where she lived and he always had some people working for him, letting him know when she was alone. She looked anyway, and her breath caught in her throat.

It was John.

A moment later she was frantically unlocking the door, jiggling the keys back and forth. Perhaps it was desperation, or just that she missed him, or both; she wasn't sure. She opened the door.

And there he was, wearing a business suit and tie, and a somewhat worried expression on his face, but he smiled when their eyes locked - and she did too. He looked relieved to see her, and she couldn't even begin to explain how it was to see him after the days she had been having - but it was as if she felt safe, all of sudden.

"John," she breathed as they stood face to face.

"Hello," he muttered, looking a little anxious.

They didn't say anything for a moment; they simply stared at one another. Anna recovered first.

"Come in, please."

He nodded, entering her place cautiously, and she closed the door behind them. Their eyes locked.

"Your flat mate let me enter-"

"How did you get-"

They laughed at the confusing words, and Anna nervously ran a hand through her hair.

"I was just making some tea," she motioned for John to follow her into the small living room. "Would you like some?"

John nodded. "That would be great."

Anna smiled. "Okay. Just... Make yourself comfortable.

She could feel his eyes watching her as she left for the kitchen, feeling butterflies in her stomach. She felt self conscious, all of sudden - she was wearing baggy old trousers and a t-shirt that had seen better days. She used the microwave as a mirror to manage her hair a little but that was the most she could do now. Taking a deep breath, she knew she could do this. It was just John. He could be here for many reasons - he could be here to tell her he was done, by all means. She wouldn't blame him if that was the case. But deep in her heart - she hoped it wasn't.

Putting on a brave face, she filled the kettle and went back into the living room.

John's eyes were darting around the room with interest, and while she thought he would be more interested in books, he seemed to be quite perplexed at the toys on the floor. He looked at her as she crossed the room and took a the toys from the floor.

"I'm sorry about the mess," she said quietly. "My flatmate has a baby boy, and he can create quite a bit of a havoc in little time."

"That's fine," John said quickly. "I should have warned you I was coming. I'm sorry."

"No, that's okay," Anna said. Perhaps he thought she didn't want him around; had it really only been two days since she left him in Downton? She put the toys inside a basket on the corner of the room and sat beside him - but not too close. "I mean, I... I've missed you."

The words left her before she could stop herself, but she was done pretending anyway. It was different now - she was different now. She fidgeted her fingers together nervously, but in the next moment John's hand rested above hers. She stopped breathing.

"I've missed you too," he said quietly. "It took me everything I had not to go after you on Sunday."

It was odd to be talking to him, sitting with him here. After all, this wasn't a hotel room where they would spend the night - this was her home and her life. And yet, at the same time, it felt right - she felt as if here, with him, she was home, really home. But she wasn't quite sure of what to say - that her attempts at making things better didn't actually help, that she couldn't see how they would go from here. But she knew she had to tell him - something, everything.

"I quit the job yesterday," she decided to start, the nervousness coming back to her quickly. "I tried to, anyway. I'm not sure how it'll go from here."

"Thomas won't bother you anymore," were John's words. She looked up at him, surprised. Whatever did he mean by that? But John continued. "I paid him a visit."

Anna's mouth opened, but no sound came from it. How would he have found Thomas? And he didn't know the full extent of his hold on her - he didn't know how Thomas was. He didn't know about the agency, he couldn't have known-

But then, Anna understood.

"Ethel told you, didn't she?" Anna asked. She felt tears at the back of her eyes. "She had no right- you shouldn't have gone, what did he tell you?"

"I'm sorry," John answered, rubbing his temple softly. He looked conflicted. "I came here to see you, but you were out. And she told me what happened. About your internship, and Thomas. I went to see him."

"Now he knows who you are," Anna said as realisation hit her. "He knows who you are and what happened between us."

"He won't bother you anymore," John said again, grasping for her hands. "I've paid your debt. If he so much as sees you, he'll suffer the consequences. What he did... What he does is illegal, Anna, you know that."

Anna shook her head. "That won't scare him unless there is proof."

"There is proof, everywhere!" John told her fiercely. "You are proof of that, and so am I. He knows that. He has his money, and he won't bother you anymore."

Anna nodded, wanting to believe him more than anything in that moment. But it wasn't easy - it wasn't simple. She wiped a tear from her cheek and took a deep breath.

"I must repay you," she mumbled, unsure of what to say.

He looked heartbroken at her words.

"I don't want anything from you," he said, "I did it because I wanted to. I want you to be able to live your life without feeling as if you owe something to someone. I want you to be free, however that may be."

His words struck a chord in her, and she looked away, unable to face his kind eyes anymore. It was all too much - the past few days, her feelings, both her jobs being gone, John telling her he loved her… It couldn't be it. How could it be that everything was solved so quickly? It couldn't be it. She doubted Thomas would let everything go so quickly, and there was still so much to consider...

"Anna," John's voice startled her, and she could feel her bottom lip trembling when she looked back at him. "Come here."

She was already halfway there when he spoke the words, and a second later she was sobbing against his neck, his strong arms surrounding her as he pulled her onto his lap, and she felt a sudden rush of emotion run through her - she wouldn't have to endure those endless nights again, with unknown men; she wouldn't have to face Thomas and hear his threats anymore.

And all because of John.

And suddenly she pulled away.

"You are a silly, silly man," she said at last, running a hand over his cheek. "I can't believe you did this, I... I love you so much."

"I love you too," he breathed, his eyes staring into her soul. "If that makes me silly, then so be it."

Anna giggled, and he wiped the tears from her cheeks softly - his hands touched her with such care that she thought she might break. She traced his lips with her index finger, feeling an utter happiness surround her heart.

"You've done so much for me," she whispered. "Can I ask of one more thing from you?"

John smiled. "Anything?"

She touched her nose against his. "Can you kiss me?"

He replied by pressing his lips against her, and in that moment, Anna swore she had never been this happy before.

* * *

Their tea was ready soon afterwards, and Anna was glad Ethel had bought a cake that morning so at least she had something to offer to John; they ate heartily and spoke of everything and nothing. He told her of his conversation with Robert, and the fact that Carlisle couldn't get to them, which was something she was glad of.

When Ethel arrived, hours later, they were back on the couch, watching The Great British Bake Off - a hidden pleasure of hers, one that John had many comments to talk about. They were almost like a normal couple - she knew they still had so much to talk about, but for now - for now, normalcy would have to do.

Ethel ended up joining them, and they had pizza for dinner - it didn't take so much insisting for John to stay, and he did. It was odd and right, how much he fit into her simple life like this - having dinner together, laughing when little Charlie devoured pizza like a true pizza lover, doing the dishes together afterwards. It was simple and normal and not at all exciting, and everything she wanted from life at the same time. When the dishes were done, and Ethel had already gone to bed, they grew quiet - unsure of what the next step would be. She knew what she wanted, and if she knew John well enough - and she knew they had so much to learn about the other - she thought he wouldn't even want to suggest it. As they finally dried the last plate, she leaned her back against the counter and took his hand.

"Would you like to stay the night?" she asked nervously. He had taken his suit jacket hours earlier, and she knew he must be dying to take off that tie.

"I'd love to," he said after a moment. "But I don't want you to feel like you have an obligation towards me."

She tugged at his hand, and raised on her tiptoes to kiss his lips softly. "It's not an obligation. I want you to stay with me."

She had never brought a man over to the flat before, so it was an unknown territory for her. She knew Ethel wouldn't mind - she had even brought Charlie's father here once or twice - but it was quite odd at the same time. They took turns in the bathroom, as there was only one, and he had waited for her in the living room first. When it was his turn, she took the opportunity to tidy her bedroom a little, though it didn't need much tidying.

A moment later, John showed up, still wearing his clothes but the tie was gone. He smiled at her, and closed the door behind him.

"Alone at last," he said quietly, and she felt her heart beat hard against her chest. He began to unbutton his shirt. "Thank you for the toothbrush."

Anna chuckled. "It's nothing. Good thing I always keep an extra. Otherwise you might have run back to the hotel."

John shook his head. "I'm staying at my mother's, actually."

She took his shirt from his hand as he took it off, and placed it over her chair, hoping it wouldn't wrinkle. As he unbuckled his belt, Anna untied her robe slowly. It was almost domestic.

"Really?" she asked, shivering slightly when the air met her skin. She had chosen a purple satin nightgown for tonight.

John stepped out of his pants and took his socks off. "Yeah. I'd invite you over," he started. She had never really met a boyfriend's mother before; she had only had one serious boyfriend before, and it didn't last long at all. She wasn't the type to meet mothers, she supposed. "But I want to do it properly. You know, take you both out to dinner or something."

She couldn't help but smile at this. "That... That sounds lovely. I'd love to meet your mother," she took his hand. "Come on, let's go to bed."

It was unfamiliar and new, to share her very own bed with another man. It wasn't as big as the hotel beds they had shared before, and probably not as comfortable, but they ended up together right in the middle anyway. The sheets covered them, and she was unsure of what to do now. His hand was at her waist, and her camisole had inadvertently moved up to her hips. The dark room couldn't hide the gleam in his eyes and she licked her lips.

She kissed him first, a mere touch of lips, really, and he seemed almost conflicted now. She couldn't understand exactly, but he kissed her back, and when she slipped her tongue inside his mouth, she knew he would be undone. But just as their kisses turned deeper, a noise made them stop.

Charlie was crying. They could hear Ethel's steps from the other room, and then out in the corridor. Anna cringed.

"I'm sorry," she apologised. "You'll be missing our hotel nights now."

John chuckled quietly, hugging her closer. "I won't. It's just... Different, being here. But just as nice. Better, in fact."

She breathed in his scent, running her hands over his chest and resting them on his shoulders.

"We should sleep," he kissed beside her eye softly. "It's been a long day."

That she could agree with. Her feet were cold against his legs as she moved, and they laughed. They could hear Ethel talking quietly to the baby from somewhere inside the flat. John lay on his back, and she snuggled against him. They kissed again, slowly, and she rested her head beside his on the pillow.

She fell asleep with a smile on her face.

* * *

It was early when John woke up. It only took him a moment to realize that he wasn't at home, or at his mother's, but at Anna's - and it was quite an odd thought, even if comforting at the same time. She was sleeping next him, her chest moving rhythmically as she breathed. He watched her for a moment; the first morning light shone through her curtains, creating a halo on the wall next to Anna, and she looked almost angelic to him. He gently picked up strand of hair that had fallen onto her face, and she didn't stir. He wondered if she had slept as badly as he had the past two nights.

Still, he was an early riser most of the time, and his mind wasn't at ease, even if yesterday solved some of their problems. Everything seemed to be fine at Grantham, and he took his words to Thomas seriously. The way his business was going, John didn't doubt he would be caught - sooner rather than later. But he was glad that Anna's debt was paid, and she could forget about it.

At least, he hoped she would. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel like she might owe him something; she didn't. He hoped she would see this as a present, of sorts - there was no need to repay it in any way.

He took his gaze away from her and his eyes roamed around the room. It was a simple, small room - barely enough space for a double bed, really. The walls were a light shade of yellow, the wardrobe was small and there were books on the shelves. The curtains were a little faded but he could see flowers in its pattern. Everything was tidy. His clothes were neatly folded on the chair and her bags were hung on the wall behind the door. He smiled when he noticed a pair of pink slippers under her desk. This was the Anna he had been wanting to meet ever since their first night.

And somehow spending time with her like the previous day only made him fall in love with her all over again.

He hadn't mentioned Ireland again - his offer still stood, but he didn't want to say it and have her accept it because she felt that she had to. He didn't want her to do it because of him. He didn't want her to have to do anything because of anyone anymore. She was her own person - a beautiful person - and he longed to see her free and happy in her own way. He never thought of her as his - she was never his. But now, more than ever, she belonged to no one. And he hoped she would be able to choose whoever she gave herself to next - and he didn't mean it physically.

She stirred beside him, and he turned his eyes away from ceiling to look at her. She frowned, eyes still closed, and moved slightly, resting her front against his side. He tried not to notice how her breasts felt against his skin. John knew she was awake - but apparently she wasn't quite ready for that yet. He couldn't help but chuckle, and at this she kissed his neck.

"Why are we awake so early?" she asked groggily. The building was quiet around them. She kissed his neck again.

He shifted slightly, and his hand rested against her back; her camisole had slid up during the night and he could feel the hem around her waist.

"You can go back to sleep," John told her in a whisper, mindful that someone else lived with her.

But Anna shook her head, and opened her eyes slowly. "You make me want to stay awake."

His heart skipped a beat.

Anna lifted her head slightly, rubbing her eyes before looking down at him. Her hair was disheveled, her eyes were impossibly blue, and her smile was the most enchanting thing he had ever seen. "That should be enough proof of my love, you know. That I want to be awake with you."

"I'll take that as it is, then," he whispered, and she leaned down to kiss him.

She spoke freely and kissed him slowly, and he wanted to believe that this was the truth. It wasn't that he doubted her - on the contrary. But he didn't want her to do this for anyone but herself.

Alas, it was hard to decline her, when she tastes as good as she did, when she looked as beautiful as she was. He tried to keep their kisses quiet and slow and safe, but he couldn't deny her, not when her tongue met his each time. She was half lying above him now, her hair caressing his face, but she seemed to sense something was wrong, and she pulled away from him.

"Is there something wrong?" she asked. His hands were still firmly planted on her waist. "You seem a little... distant."

A cloud of uncertainty covered her eyes. He didn't like it.

"No, I'm right here," he answered. "Just... Your friend is right down the corridor."

She touched her nose against his and blinked, still a little sleepily. "She's asleep. We just have to be quiet."

He nodded wordlessly, though he still wasn't sure about this. Was she giving herself to him because she wanted to, or because she felt like she had to? It was the last thing he wanted.

"Just... We don't have to do this," he found himself saying, just as Anna was about to kiss him again. She stopped in her tracks, and pulled away again, this time with more distance between their bodies. He didn't like it.

"Okay," she whispered, sitting back against the wall, far from him - too far from him. "Of course, we don't have to do this if you don't want to."

He sat up too, pushing the sheets slightly aside. One side of her camisole was hanging off her shoulder. She looked entirely too vulnerable.

"I want to," he was quick to tell her, "but I don't want you to feel like you have to."

Anna looked perplexed at his words. "I don't feel like I have to, I... I want to. I've missed you."

"I've missed you too," he confessed, but not looking into her eyes. "I just... I guess a part of me thought you were only with me because I was paying. And I'm sorry about that," he added, before she could say anything. He looked at her again. "I'm sure you've been with... Better men than me. Better looking, younger."

She didn't speak immediately, but she reached for his hand slowly, and he let her lace their fingers together.

"I haven't been with anyone else since our second night together," she said softly. "No one else ever compared to you. No one. And I mean it when I say that I don't feel an obligation towards you. But if... If you can't see past that-"

"I just want you to do what you want," he interrupted her, "not what you feel that other people want."

"I know what I want," she told him, letting go of his hand and crawling her way back to him. His mouth felt dry. "I feel like I've known it for a while now."

She stopped just beside him, her eyes boring into his with a clearness that surprised him. She raised her hand, her fingertips tracing the lines beside his eye, and he wondered what was it that she saw.

"I love your hair," she commented, running her hand through it. "I love how soft it feels against my fingers. I love your kisses, because they make me feel like I'm the only girl on earth. And I love your eyes. At first I thought they were brown, but they're green. Even if sometimes I feel uncomfortable with the way you look at me."

John frowned. His hands were stroking her thighs. "Like what?"

Anna chuckled. "I don't know. Like I mean so much to you," she became serious. "I thought I was imagining it at first, but after Saturday, I can believe it," her fingers traced his lips softly. "Can you believe it too?"

He grasped at her hand, pressing a kiss on the back of her fingers.

"I already do," he told her. "You can't blame an old man for self-doubting."

He meant it as a joke, but she shook her head and remained serious. "Don't say that. Don't put yourself down."

He nodded, a promise to himself and to her. And this time, he was the one to kiss her. Her lips were soft and melting against his, and perhaps it was the early morning hour, or the day they had shared, or the fact that it felt like they hadn't seen each other and been with each other in so long - but the kisses turned desperate soon, and the touches became bold quickly. He gently pushed her down on her back, but not before she took off her camisole, revealing her pale skin to him once more. Despite the rush, their touches were gentle and careful; he ran his hands over her breasts and down to her hips and he would never stop feeling amazed at how she responded to him and his touches. When she moaned, he chuckled, and nuzzled against her neck.

"I thought you said we had to be quiet," he teased, and Anna let out a shaky breath, smacking his arm lightly.

"Cheeky beggar," she whispered as his hands pulled at her knickers. She raised her hips, helping him out, and the garment was thrown behind them on the bed.

Just the sight of her was enough to make him feel tight against his boxers, and it didn't help when Anna's hand stroked him through them. She pushed at his chest, and she turned on her side, still touching him. He hissed, leaning down to kiss her collarbone, and his hand reached down, touching her centre slowly. God, she was wet. He could feel himself twitching as he parted her folds and Anna opened her legs wider. Her hips thrust forward. She pulled at his underwear.

"I need you," was her whisper against his ear.

It only took him a moment to take them off and be back in front of her; his hands squeezed her behind softly, and then Anna was touching him, bringing him to her entrance. They moved together, in unison, at a rhythm that was slow and tentative at first. Anna ran her hands over his chest and settled them on his face. Her eyelids fluttered, but she didn't stop looking at him.

"I've missed you too," he whispered, kissing her cheek, her jaw. "So much. I don't know how I lived before I met you."

A ghost of a smile graced her lips. He moved faster. "You're quite the orator," she said breathlessly. Her knee was raised to his waist. He lifted one of his hands from her behind to caress her breast. She let out a husky moan. He was in love with that sound. She kissed him. It was deep, intimate - the way they moved, the way they were connected. It had never been like this for him before - sex with her was incredible. Sex with her was... More than sex, even. They pulled away - Anna let out a low moan, and he reached down to touch her again.

She only closed her eyes when she cried out, and he never wanted to forget the sweet expression on her face so close to his before he followed her into the abyss.

* * *

They lay together afterwards, her naked body curled around his, his hand stroking her hair affectionately. They would have to get up soon, she knew it, but it was still early and she rather liked having him with her. Her head was rested against his chest and she listened to his heart beats. It was as if the world stopped around her - she felt as if his solid frame against her was the only thing that mattered at that moment.

She thought about what would happen now - she let herself think of it. She had little money put aside, having paid quite a bit of it to Thomas two days ago. John had ended her debt. But she was unemployed, and she couldn't afford anything right now. She would have to find something else soon.

"Do you ever wish you could start over?" she found herself asking. "Go to another town, where no one would know your name."

"That's what I did, after my divorce," John chuckled. "I have some cousins in Ireland though. So at least a few people there knew my name."

Anna giggled, and shifted so she could look up at him. He looked so content, so relaxed. She smiled.

"Maybe people could know my name," she admitted. "But not many, mind you. But it would be nice to finish school and start over."

He nodded, still stroking her hair. She felt relaxed as well, more than she had been in a long time.

"My offer still stands," he said softly. "If you want to come to Ireland, that is. But only if you want to."

Anna thought about his words. She had almost forgotten about his proposition - perhaps she hadn't let herself think too much of it for fear that it had been spoken in a moment of despair. But he was saying it again, and it was tempting. So very tempting.

There was nothing to root her in London. She didn't have many friends, and no family at all. She had her course to finish but she could probably find a similar course in Ireland. Classes would start in just a few weeks but perhaps there would be time for that. She wasn't sure. But she wanted to go with him - even if people might think it strange and risky, she could never think that. John was different. She longed to know him properly - fall in love with his silliness and be annoyed at his little habits, whatever they might be.

"I know we don't know each other that well," John continued. "And even if you don't want to live with me, you can always stay for a while until you find your own place in Dublin. If you'd like to start over there. But if you don't - I can keep making trips to London just to see you."

They laughed, and she considered his words. His hand caressed her jaw and she licked her lips. "I'd like to know you properly. Be mad at you for leaving your shoes in the middle of the hallway. Fall asleep with you every day."

John shrugged. "That doesn't sound so bad, does it?" she kissed him as he chuckled. "I'll be in London until Saturday. I'd like you to think about it."

"But if I want to give you an answer now?" she asked. He gave her a hard look. "I'll think about it. I should check with the university, just in case."

"Do that. That should be your focus from now on," he said slowly. He pulled her close, and gave her a sweet kiss. She would be googling all the universities in Dublin today.

The sound of her alarm startled them both, and they jumped at the sound of it; Anna covered her face and groaned - how she hated that noise. John was laughing as he turned it off, and she couldn't help but smile at him.

"Don't laugh at me. That's the worst noise ever," she mumbled, and his arms embraced her close one more time, kissing her again.

"I won't argue you with that," he said, still chuckling. "I have to go. I have a meeting with the council at 10. And I must face my mother, who will undoubtedly ask me about where I spent the night."

She watched as he managed to pull away from her and get up, admiring his backside as he grabbed his boxers from the floor next to the bed. She gave him a lazy smile.

"You're a naughty boy," she laughed, snuggling against his pillow. "Do you at least have some time for breakfast?"

"I'd be taking advantage of your hospitality," John commented, but she gave him a pointed look. "I can stay for breakfast."

Anna got up too, stretching her arms as she stood - she was already clad in her camisole, having changed before to a quick trip to the bathroom, and caught him staring when she opened her eyes again, just as he was putting on his trousers.

"What is it?" she asked sleepily, reaching for her satin robe and tying it on her waist. "It's not like you haven't seen me in the morning before."

"I know, but every day is different," he said, and she gave him a peck on his lips.

He was right - and for the first time, she woke up looking forward to these days ahead of them.

They kept silent as they walked through the flat, and closed the kitchen door behind them. She found out that John could cook, and she didn't want to live without seeing him making an omelette every morning. They had coffee - she needed to properly wake up, and it seemed to be his drink of choice for early mornings as well. He managed to straighten up his tie and clothes and promised her he would call later, while he made her promise to think carefully about his proposition.

"I want you to do this for yourself," he had said once more, as she walked him to the door. "Not for me."

"I will," she said again as she unlocked the door. She gave him a smile. "Thank you."

"What for?" he stepped out of the flat.

"I don't know. Everything," she let out a deep breath, and traced the material of his tie slowly. "Loving me."

His smile was bright. "That's the easiest thing to do."

They exchanged one more kiss and she stood in the doorway, waving until he couldn't be seen anymore, disappearing into the corner of the corridor. She sighed wistfully and closed the door, locking up again and leaning her back against it. She missed him already.

And now, she could let herself dream.


	10. X

**A/N:** So this is the end! I know people feel like it could go on - I know it could - but to me, if I kept writing this, it would just be another modern story, and the business wouldn't make much sense anymore ;) I hope the last chapter doesn't disappoint. It covers a lot, and it's the longest chapter so far, but I felt like this John and this Anna deserved a proper ending. I hope everyone likes this. I never would have guessed that from that little one shot I was so unsure about this story would be written, and I never imagined it would get so much feedback. So I really, really hope the ending will be acceptable. Since S6 starts soon, I don't expect to write much - perhaps a little one shot or two, we'll see! :) Thanks Terrie for being an awesome editor - and for all the reviewers and guest reviewers so far! Here we go... Please let me know your thoughts on the ending!

* * *

X.

When the plane stopped moving and Anna looked out of the window, it was sunny. So much sunnier than the rainy London she had left behind. And when she looked to her other side, and met John's eyes, she felt warm inside. Her new start was beginning now.

She had never been to Ireland, but she found it a bit similar to England, at least during the ride from the airport. She would later learn all the differences between the countries, and John would take her to all the spots she must know as a Dublin resident, but now she had to meet her new home for the first time, or at least for the time being. They agreed she would stay with him, for now at least. The rest they would figure out as it happened. But she was already mesmerised by it all - the docks, the pubs, the parks. She wanted to know this town better than she knew London. Perhaps she would be able to explore it like she never really could explore her previous residence.

Still, her heart was bittersweet for leaving; leaving her home country behind was hard and something she anticipated as being difficult. But she didn't have much family left besides a few distant cousins, and Ethel was moving to live nearer to Charlie's grandparents. When she managed to get herself transferred to Dublin from university, she took it. And just a few days later John was back in England to help her make her move.

His house was bigger than she anticipated. She had expected a bachelor flat, probably some big studio in a trendy place, but instead he took her to what seemed to be a very traditional neighborhood, and when he parked the car she saw many three story terraced houses. His had a dark blue door, and she already loved it. He waved at an elderly neighbor and opened the door for her.

"Welcome to your new home," he said quietly, and Anna entered the house slowly. She smiled at John as she let go of the suitcase she was carrying, and he went back to the car to get her third and final piece of luggage - the rest of her things would arrive this week.

The walls were creamy coloured and the stairs were made of a dark hardwood. She wasn't sure where to go from here, so she decided to turn right and see the ground floor for herself. It was clean and simple - she wondered if he had it specially cleaned for her. A few paintings on the walls, but not much. A black couch and a television - she could see a record player in the corner and a few discs, and that seemed to fit John's character well and she smiled. This was his life, the one she didn't really know yet. And she already loved it.

She heard the front door close and turned around, meeting John's eyes as he leaned against the doorway. He smiled at her, but his voice had a tone of uncertainty as he spoke.

"It's still a bit unfurnished, I'm afraid," he started. "I always intended for this to be an investment rather than a home, but I ended up staying."

"I love it so far," Anna said honestly. His smile got bigger.

"Let me give you the grand tour, then," he said softly, offering her his hand, and she took it.

Despite the living room, the ground floor featured a half bathroom, a rather empty dining room and a big kitchen - she thought she could fit her entire flat inside the dining room and the kitchen and John had laughed at her remark. The middle floor had yet to be properly used - one bedroom belonged to his mother whenever she visited, and Anna had to admit that it felt very much homely, filled with books, a television and even a computer, and she smiled at remembering the lovely lady she had met barely two weeks ago in London. The other bedroom was empty, and the living room was currently being used as a library, though, as Anna noticed, it wasn't exactly organized. John had nearly blushed when they got there.

"I need to settle my office properly, I know," he said a little embarrassingly. It was a big room, and it seemed like he didn't know what to do with all its space.

He had rented the house when he arrived in London, he told her - and when the previous owner needed money and was ready to sell at a very low price, John decided to buy it. The owner had started renovating it, even, but he never got through with it. One of the items that would have been added was a lift, and John had joked that he might need to work on that soon, just as they reached the top floor.

"I'll be damned if I have to climb all these stairs when I'm older," he commented, and she shook her head at him. "If we are to stay here, it's something we will have to consider. My mother complains whenever she visits."

Anna laughed - Maggie Bates had been nothing but lovely to her, but she could see that John's mother didn't think honesty was ever too much.

"We have another empty room there, I'm afraid," John told her as they reached the landing and he pointed to an open door on the left. Indeed, the room was empty save for some curtains on the windows. "There's another bathroom over here and," he continued, walking towards the door in the middle, "this is our bedroom."

Perhaps it was the words he used, or the fact that this room was possibly the most decorated one yet. The bed was big and the dark blue linens gave it a rather manly look but it did not look any less comfortable. It was simple yet beautiful - a painting or two, a few photographs. The walls were a light blue as well, and she liked it. John's hand left hers and his arm went around her shoulders and she leaned into his frame and sighed.

"Everything needs a bit of work, I'm afraid," John let out a sigh as well. "I guess that if I have a partner to work with I'll be able to get things going. What's the verdict?"

Anna turned in his arms, facing him and resting her hands on the back of his neck.

"I love it," she beamed. "All of it. It's lovely."

Perhaps this didn't feel like her home yet, but when she kissed him and his smile reached his ears, she was sure this was her home now. When they were lying together that night, breaths mingling, him moving inside her and she struggling to catch her breath, she was sure that she was home - for good.

* * *

He was watching her from the doorway as she danced - she had picked up her huge sunglasses from the coffee table and was now dancing in her pyjamas, her index finger signaling that she wanted him to come closer. He had to snicker at this - perhaps she had drank a little too much wine tonight, but he couldn't help but find her endearing. They had had a full day - he took the advantage of it being a Saturday to show her the city, and they had had quite a bit of fun. It was only her second day in Dublin but he hoped she would soon see it as her home.

"Come on, take my hand," she sang, and this time he walked towards her.

Anna kept singing and dancing, and he simply watched as she laughed and danced around him; he especially gave a hearty laugh when she did the Egyptian move.

"Dance with me," she asked again, but he shook his head.

"You come here," he said, pulling her close, but she twirled then, and he lost his balance, whilst Anna didn't have much of it left herself.

They fell on the couch and a loud crack followed; Anna fell on top of him, and after a moment he only wanted to check if she was alright - her sunglasses had slid to the tip of her nose and her hair was disheveled from its ponytail, but before he could ask anything, she spoke.

"Did we break the couch?" her voice was a slurred whisper.

John nodded. "We broke the couch."

At this, she laughed, resting her forehead against his shoulder. He joined in; the music was still playing from his old record player and Anna was sat above him, giggling like a child. He realised just how much she belonged here, in this living room, laughing over a silly thing. He hoped she would realise it too.

She pulled away from him, looking at him in a most dazed fashion. Her index finger touched his nose pointedly.

"I love you, you know," she said softly, resting her head against his shoulder again. He ran his hands down her sides as she relaxed.

"I know," he said with a smile. "And you know I love you too."

Her response to his whisper was a soft snore against his ear, and John had to do his best not to laugh at this situation – Anna was drunk, they broke the couch, and she fell asleep sitting on his lap. She remained fast asleep for the next few minutes, during which he pondered what to do; he ultimately decided to carry her to bed, seeing as they were both dressed for sleep already. He couldn't blame her for drinking and wanting to have fun; it wasn't easy to adjust to a new life, and he could only hope that Dublin wouldn't be too hard on her.

His breathing was laboured when he finally reached the third floor – really, was the idea of a lift that bad? – and Anna had done nothing more than a groan or two as he carried her. He managed to put her into bed without further problems, and he stopped to watch her for a moment. He knew his house wasn't exactly perfect – it was too big for one person, sparsely decorated, empty in more than one way. But as he watched Anna sleep in her blue flannel pyjamas, wearing a ponytail and looking entirely too content, he decided that his house was slightly less empty with her there – it seemed like she was the missing piece.

A few minutes later, he joined her in bed, turning off the lamp and deciding against reading tonight – he too was tired, and he hoped Anna's snores wouldn't get too loud. She snuggled against him quickly, and he made a mental note to himself to wake her with some tea ready and possibly something for the headache she would surely have. But perhaps next time he could indulge himself and share that bottle of wine with her.

* * *

It was a gradual process, all in all. Anna spent her first week there calling companies and sending curriculums everywhere. She took walks around the neighbourhood and jogged every morning by the river. She made friends with a woman four houses away from them, as she jogged too. Anyone could tell she was English from her accent, but despite a joke or two, nothing bothered her.

It was a matter of knowing John better too; they hadn't really dated before, they didn't really know what they liked to do for fun or what kind of shows they liked. Thankfully, none of that seemed to be a problem; they were similar in so many ways. John was naturally quiet and didn't have many friends around – apart from a cousin he saw regularly, their evenings consisted of sometimes going out for dinner, grocery shopping and the like; most times, they stayed in. Anna didn't mind that at all.

Still, it was quite hard at first. They replaced the broken couch – it was moved to John's office temporarily, and he bought a settee and a couch for the living room downstairs; she helped choosing it. He made sure she was included in such things, and she welcomed that. When asked what he would do with the broken couch, he shrugged.

"I don't know. It was the only furniture I got with my divorce," he explained. "Vera hated it. So I guess it's been hard to let it go."

She learned more and more every day.

He loved cooking, and while she wasn't great at it she could hold her own in the kitchen. Still, his love for it made her want to try new things and it had been an adventure at first. One time, they had to order a pizza because her dinner turn out as planned. She was heartbroken, but John had only laughed and assured her it would be better next time.

He was right, because it eventually was.

School left her quite busy, but without any internship she still had some free time to do whatever she wished. Her classes were close by, and she started using John's bicycle to go to the university – it was a little old, and barely used, she noticed, but it was fun, and she got to know her way around.

He could be incredibly unorganized at times. While the house was mostly tidy, his office was endearingly named the messy room, and she couldn't find it in herself to not agree with him there. Every Saturday he would take her to some different place in Ireland – sometimes within Dublin. Sometimes it would be a restaurant on the edge of a cliff.

On her second month there, she got an internship – again in an accounting company. It was great to have her own money again; John had let her pay for their dinner when her first pay check came, and she bought some flowers for the house with it too. She thought the place could use some life in it, and John had said it was a good idea. The thought of not living with him never really crossed her mind; he was a lovely person to live with, even when he would become a little stressed from work. He was never anything short of respectful to her, and he encouraged her to meet up with the girls from work and to pursue bigger opportunities. It helped that he was also a great roommate.

"Where did you get this?" he asked her one night, his finger tracing the corner of her left eye – the scar she had there. The room was dark around them and his naked chest tickled her breasts as they lay together, bodies cooling off with each passing second.

"Car accident when I was a teenager," she told him softly, "a few centimetres to the right and I would have lost my eyesight."

And she told him the whole story – how the accident ultimately made her and her father go to the hospital, how they were both mostly unscathed, but after some routine tests were made, the results weren't very positive to her father. He had smoked his whole life and didn't want to stop. Less than a year later, he died.

"I smoked," John told her quietly when she finished her story. It was a long time ago. Her dad would have loved John. "After my divorce, it escalated quite quickly."

"What made you stop?" Anna asked him, breathing in his scent.

"You did," his reply surprised her. She pulled away to watch him. "I met you and I didn't feel like smoking anymore. I always knew it wasn't good for me, anyway."

She smiled. "I'm glad you did. I want you healthy and safe here, with me."

Slowly, and suddenly, their walls crumbled. It didn't take too long for her to open up to him completely, and it was such an easy thing to do, really. He was very good at listening. He bought her chocolate when she was upset with something even before he even knew she was upset. His mother taught her how to bake his favourite chocolate cake when she was around one weekend. Little things could make all the difference, Anna remembered her mother telling her. She tried to live by this rule.

Still, things weren't easy. Sharing a life was never easy, and when one had a past like hers, it could be even more difficult. It took him a long time to initiate things between them – he always seemed to be holding back, for some reason. They argued more than once because of this; she didn't feel like she owed him, and she always tried to assure him that she was there because she loved him and that was it. But sometimes he could be so insecure, and it would annoy her so much.

Anna had her own issues too, even she had to admit it. She didn't like talking about her past, but she found that it often helped her if she did. She never went into details, and John listened. It was more about the situation than the job itself, as awful as that was. But little things crept into her life with him, and she hated it.

"John," she said one Sunday morning as he kissed the back of her neck and his hands stroked her front. She could feel him hard against her bottom. "John, can I turn?"

"Why?" he hummed.

"I like to be able to see you," she said softly, eyes closing on their own accord as his hand stroked her breast.

He allowed her to turn, and she smiled when she did, and his kisses continued and he made love to her like he always would – gently and slowly and bringing her to the edge more than once. But it was afterwards, almost an hour later, when he brought her breakfast in bed and they were having a lazy morning together that the issue was brought up again.

Anna didn't like talking about her past business because she knew he wouldn't like to hear it. She had done many things she never wanted to do, with men she would never have considered. She hoped he understood that, but she also knew it was difficult. Men always wanted to see her back, not her face. They liked to pretend she was someone else. And she wanted to see John and she wanted him to see her too.

"I never pretend you're someone else," he argued, and she didn't doubt that.

"I know that. But I don't... I don't like to be reminded," she said softly.

The rest of the meal was spent in silence, and she was unsure of what to say. When he unceremoniously took the tray off the bed once she was done without saying a word, she got nervous. John was a quiet man, but she could tell this bothered him.

"Darling," she called, and he looked at her from his position at the doorway. "Talk to me. Please. Don't brood."

He was conflicted, she could tell.

"I'm not, I just... I don't like the thought that I can remind you of your job," he said after a moment. "Of other men."

"You don't remind me of other men," she said as he let out a deep breath and placed the tray on the desk next to the door. He sat back on the edge of the bed. "You've never done that."

"But you've been with many –"

"Many men I never really met, many men I didn't care about," she told him, slowly crawling her way towards him. John still appeared confused. She hugged him from behind and fit her chin on his shoulder. "You've taught me so much about... Caring, and loving, and intimacy. You still do, every day. No one hates my past more than I do, but it's there, and it's what brought us together."

He shook his head slightly, placed his hand on top of hers, laced their fingers together. They fit so well – it was as if they were made for each other. Perhaps they were.

He turned his head and kissed her cheek, and she closed her eyes at the feeling of his lips upon her skin.

"I'm sorry," he said in a whisper. She unconsciously nodded. "My darling."

"It doesn't matter who came before me in your life, or who came before you in mine," she told him with a smile. "It matters that we are together now."

John nodded and caught her lips in a sweet, slow kiss. They loved each other more every day and every night.

No silly argument could stop that.

* * *

The first thing John heard when he got home was the sound of laughter coming from the kitchen. There was a nice smell in the air, garlic perhaps. He wondered what Anna was up to.

He left his suitcase on the first step of the stairs and took off his suit jacket and tie before going to the kitchen. Indeed, there he found Anna by the counter and his mother sitting at the bar. Their smiles were enchanting enough; Anna had gone to the airport in the afternoon to get his mother and he loved how well they got on. It was never like this with his first wife. Even with Anna's history, his mother did not judge. If it was up to him, he wouldn't have told her, but it was Anna who insisted she know - better to be told by themselves than learn it in some way or the other. His mother was surprised, to say the least - and very much confused that the lovely woman she had met could have such a past. But a few meetings with Anna were enough to make her forget that and focus on the new daughter-in-law she now had - even if it wasn't official yet.

"Hello, Mum," he greeted his mother first, kissing her cheek and giving her a hug. Then, he walked towards Anna. "Darling."

They shared a quick peck and he noticed how lovely she looked with the black apron tied around her waist.

"I'm glad you decided to not stay late at the office and spend some time with your mother," Anna teased, and the wink she sent towards his mother did not go unnoticed.

"You talk as if I spend more time at the office than anywhere," he smiled back at her. "Something smells delicious."

"Don't get your hopes up, it's just spaghetti," Anna laughed, then turned to look at his mother. "John has been trying to teach me how to cook, Maggie."

"Has he really?" his mother asked as she watched them.

"And she's a great student," John said, sharing a smile with Anna. "Did you have a good flight, Mum?"

"Oh, uneventful, so that's the best kind," his mother told him with a smile. "Do you need any help there, dear?"

"Thank you, Maggie, but everything's under control. I think," Anna said humorously, then looked at John. "Could you set up the table, love?"

"Of course. Do you need any help with the sauce?"

"No, I think it's going okay," she flashed him a smile. He trusted her.

Anna's graduation would be happening next week, and his mother had chosen to spend a few days with them then; while Anna often commented that she was entirely too old to be graduating now, she was still so young, and he was happy that at least one of her dreams was finally coming true.

They had shared a lovely dinner together – Anna's cooking definitely improved from when she first arrived in Dublin. She was thriving, and that was what mattered. The company she had been working for offered her a permanent position and she had friends – probably more friends than he did, honestly. Anna was a much more social person than he would ever be. Still, she enjoyed their quiet evenings in, and it seemed that she took great pleasure in making him join her for her shopping or to explore little antique shops. He didn't mind it at all, not really, even if he pretended to be annoyed from time to time.

Anna retired early – he knew she had had a rather long day – and he was left alone with his mother for some time. They talked about the possibility of her moving back to Ireland – now that he had fixed residence there, and what with Anna now, he didn't think he would leave anytime soon. His mother visited often, even more often now, and it would be good for her if she moved, he thought, to be closer to family.

That night, he snuck into their bedroom holding a small box with a gold band inside it, and thankfully Anna was too sleepy to notice it when he hid it in a drawer with his socks, just so she wouldn't find it. His mind was filled with questions – questions, not doubts – but half of them went away when he slipped beside her in the bed and he felt her arms around his middle, hugging him close.

She said yes on the night of her graduation.

* * *

It was always like Anna said – her past would always be there. It wouldn't be a huge part of their life, but it would be there. He knew she worried about it – she worried about his friends finding out. She worried about their children finding out, in a far off future. They both wanted children – he would rather have them sooner than later, as he considered his age; he was now nearly forty-four years old. But Anna was still young – she had just started a new job, and they weren't even married yet. No, he agreed with her, that they should wait a little before considering children. Enjoy life together before tying themselves to children.

They travelled; they went to Scotland, France and Italy. Once, she was able to go to New York with him – he had business there, and she was able to take a few days off work to join him. Hotel nights were different when they were knackered from being tourists all day, but hotel mornings still had some excitement in them – to be able to make love to her and then leave together to spend more time together would never get old to him.

"Do you miss living here?" he asked one night when they got ready for bed, in his mother's house. "In London?"

Anna shook her head. "No, I much prefer Dublin. It's not this big, and not this confusing. I have my job, we have the house," she smiled. The house was much more homely nowadays; Anna found a place where they could fix the broken couch and his office was now very organized – and it even featured two desks, one for each of them. After her graduation, she had a haircut – her hair was now shorter, just above her shoulders, and though he had been sad to see the long locks go, she looked great anyway. "I have you."

He had a feeling she would have him wherever she may go.

While it was easy to forget how they had met, the frustration of the beginning of their relationship, the struggle to be together, sometimes it would catch up with them. They were in London when they found out of Thomas' arrest, and John had read it in his breakfast newspaper. He could tell she was relieved, but at the same time there was the question of an investigation. If it would reach her, if it would want to use her. She was apprehensive.

When the police knocked on his mother's door two days later, Anna told them everything she knew, and he was present through it all. Her testimony would be useful, but not necessary for a trial. He had never heard so many details of his coercion on her – and perhaps if he had before, the consequences wouldn't have been positive for him. He was glad that rat was in jail now, and would likely spend quite some time there. Sometimes emotional abuse could be just as bad as physical.

They were married two days later, in a registry office in Dublin.

* * *

They didn't really have a honeymoon, but Anna liked it that way. They had been wondering what to do with about wedding, but the months passed since their engagement and she didn't really want something big and pompous. When the Thomas thing came to light, she decided she would tell John the truth - unless he wanted a big wedding, she didn't care for one.

Since everything had been done rather hastily, they didn't plan for anything. Their wedding evening consisted of a lovely dinner they cooked together, and John even drank a glass of champagne in celebration. Their lovemaking was slow and amazing and familiar, and that was just the way she liked it.

"It's odd," she commented later, as she rested her head on John's chest and listened to his heartbeat. Her rings glistened against the pale light from the bedside lamp - one of them adorned with a single small white rock, the other a simple thin gold band. "I feel as if I've been married to you ever since I came here. But in a way, it feels different."

"You are Mrs Bates now," John said against her ear, and she turned her head to see the smile on his face. "I didn't feel married to you when you first came. But I think I did after our first fight."

"It was hardly a fight. You had that very bad habit of leaving your shoes everywhere," she laughed. "There were six pairs in the hallway alone."

"And that was the moment when I realised I had myself a wife," John chuckled and brought her close. "You don't regret it, do you? Coming here. Living with me."

She gave him a pointed kiss. "I don't. I never did," she ran a hand through his hair. "I love you."

"I love you too," he replied, moving them so he was on top of her. Anna gave a little yelp but giggled nonetheless, especially when he proceeded to attack her neck with kisses. "Since you've already had your way with me, I think it's only fair to get started on the other way around."

Anna let out a throaty laugh. "Already? I haven't even rested yet."

"You'll enjoy it, I promise," he said just as he caught a nipple between his teeth.

Anna's breathing stopped for a moment. "You sound so very sure of yourself."

His response was a chuckle, and she didn't even mind that her own words didn't sound so sure; they both knew what he was capable of and less than ten minutes later she was crying out in pleasure.

Perhaps for some living together made it difficult to keep passion going, but it wasn't really a problem for them; they didn't have sex every day or every night, but it happened constantly and sometimes without a warning - it just happened. Sometimes in bed, sometimes on the living room rug and a couple of times in the kitchen.

But while at first it was such a big part of their relationship, it gave away some space for other things as well. Sex was important in any romantic relationship, but so was companionship and trust.

Their marriage had only started, but she looked forward to many years of happiness with John by her side.

* * *

One year of marriage went by fast, and it also marked nearly three years of relationship between them. It seemed like a long time, and things were progressing well; Anna got a promotion at work and John added one hotel to the ones he administered in Ireland. His trips to England weren't as common now, but still happened, and Robert would often visit when he was around. One evening, during which they entertained Robert, Cora, a heavily pregnant Mary and her now husband Matthew, the question popped up for the first time.

"You won't wait too long to have yours, will you, Anna?" it was Mary who asked as they sat in the dining room.

Anna smiled gracefully, a little embarrassed, and tried to avoid John's eye. "Well, we haven't really planned yet. We wanted to wait a little at first. I needed to adjust to Ireland first."

"But you seem well-adjusted, and I know your business is going well," Robert chimed in, looking at John. "Don't wait too much, Bates, or you'll be a grandfather to your own children."

They all laughed, but Anna could see John wasn't comfortable with that. Hours later, when they were alone in their bedroom, she would bring up the subject.

"I'm not that old," John had said in response to her comment about Robert. "I'm happy to wait. I'll be ready when you're ready."

"And if... I'm ready now?" Anna suggested from her position on the bed, sitting up against the headboard. John was taking off his shirt. He looked at her with a skeptical expression on his face. "I'm serious. I'll be thirty-one in a few months. Maybe we should consider it."

"You've always said you wanted to enjoy married life," he said as he joined her in bed.

"And you don't think that we do?" she giggled. "It always takes people some time anyway. We might as well start soon. What do you think?"

He remained silent, deep in thought. Anna brushed her shoulder against his and smiled. "We could have fun trying, anyway."

Their eyes met. He smiled. "Alright. But only if you want to."

She kissed him soundly and moved to straddle him. "I do. I'll schedule a checkup with my doctor and make sure we're all good for it."

"You make it sound like a scientific project," John laughed, running his hands over her thighs.

"Half of you, half of me," she kissed him again. "I can't wait."

"Me neither."

* * *

But in the end, they proved that they could wait. Anna got herself cleared with the doctor, but after a year of trying and no result, another trip to the doctor was necessary - this time, to both of them.

Their diet changed. Tests were made - nothing seemed to be wrong with either of them, but they simply wouldn't conceive. Anna never even had a false alarm that lasted more than one day. All methods of contraception were abandoned a year ago. Alcohol was dropped from their daily life completely and Anna would often take her temperature and get everything down on an app on her phone. Sex became an obligation they both liked to have, but an obligation nevertheless.

But months passed, and nothing happened. They tried not to live by it; their days were still pretty much the same. They did the crosswords from the local newspaper together. Anna bought new flowers to the house often. They took road trips on Sundays to enjoy the good weather when it happened. They dreamed of decorating one of those spare bedrooms in the house.

After a year of that, John proposed they take a vacation. They were both in need of some time off everything - their jobs, their life, the pregnancy attempts. They spent a week in Greece on what John called their late proper honeymoon, and she guessed that all they had really needed was to relax.

A month later, she gave him the happiest news of his life.

* * *

In their years together, they had never had to deal with someone from her past bringing old memories to her. They both knew it was a possibility. They both understood it could happen. But it never did, and she guessed they got used to it.

John had an event in London, at the Park Lane hotel - the one they had shared so many nights in. Tonight would be one of those nights. His mother had finally decided to move to Ireland, and was currently living in a lovely flat just a few blocks from their house - John had wanted her to live with them, but Maggie was adamant that she needed her own space. With her house in London now rented, they would spend the night in the hotel, something they hadn't done in a while.

Anna felt slightly uncomfortable. Her feet were swollen and she spent most of the night sitting. She would normally want to have a lovely dance with her husband, but she didn't feel like moving around too much. She felt like a whale, if she were honest with herself. There was a time in pregnancy that she felt like glowing, but now wasn't it. She was more impatient than ever - to meet the baby, see their little face, care for them. In a month the baby would arrive, if everything went accordingly. John had been reticent about attending to this party, but she insisted. It would be a long time before they would go to one of these events once the baby arrived. They should enjoy this time together.

Still, the dress made her uncomfortable, the heels weren't too high and she knew she looked very short next to her husband. But John smiled and kissed her cheek.

"You look lovely," he told her yet again, and she allowed herself to smile.

"When's the baby due, Mrs. Bates?" the wife of one of John's co-workers asked.

Anna rested a hand on her belly and stroked there absentmindedly. "June. So not too long to go."

She had smiled. "So you must be getting impatient."

"Just a tad," Anna said, sharing a look with John.

Before the conversation could go on, a man and his young companion arrived and greeted John. Anna was used to this; John's trips to London were becoming less frequent and he always knew so many people around here. The man's companion - there was no ring in their hands - looked to be very young, whereas he was seemingly older than John.

"This is my wife, Anna," John's voice brought her out of her reverie. Anna smiled politely and offered her hand. "Ed here is one of our main investors."

But the man did not take it right away, and his next words turned her body cold.

"You look familiar."

He took her hand then, but apparently failed to notice the discomfort on Anna's part. His eyes were suspicious. John's arm rested over her shoulders protectively.

"Do I?" Anna asked with a tight smile. She wasn't sure of what to say - perhaps the man looked slightly familiar to her. Everything was so different now - she was older, different. Her hair was different. She was heavily pregnant. Perhaps he was mistaking her for someone else. "Perhaps we've seen each other in Ireland."

"Right, you live in Ireland, don't you?" he looked back at John. He looked terribly familiar. "My old age is probably getting me. We should be going, shouldn't we, love?" he eyed his young companion. "Congratulations on the baby, Bates."

Anna let out a breath in relief. She felt like she could be sick. Five years since she frequented these events, and this was the first time it felt too real. She was almost sure that man had been her client once. Just once - but it was enough. She felt a little lightheaded.

"We should go to our room," John said at once. She simply nodded; words were unnecessary. John offered her his arm and she took it, for both emotional and physical support. They bid their goodbyes quickly and made their way to their room.

She felt slightly calmer by the time they reached the lift, but she guessed it more because John's soft lips on her and his quiet voice asking if she was alright. He was always incredibly protective towards her, and the pregnancy seemed to only highlight that. Still, she worried. Maybe he didn't recognise her, but maybe he did. What if he had? Would he have said anything to anyone? John would always say that it didn't matter, but she knew better than that.

When they reached the bedroom, she went straight to the bathroom, eager to put some water on her face and feel a little more comfortable. John did not question her, but they both knew it was a conversation they would have to have. The baby moved slightly inside her - maybe a foot under her rib. The baby was already in position to be born, the doctor had told them on her latest ultrasound. She let out a shaky breath and ran a hand over her stomach.

She brushed her teeth, took off her makeup and combed her hair before making her way back to the bedroom. John had already taken his suit and jacket off, as well as his shoes. He smiled when he saw her.

"Feel any better?" he asked her from his seat on the bed.

Anna nodded and opened the wardrobe to get her nightgown. She was eager to get out of this dress. "Yeah. Someone has been kicking under my rib all evening."

"She may be a football player in the future," John joked, and she laughed as she unzipped her dress. "Let me help you."

She appreciated the help - getting in and out of clothes and shoes was becoming a little difficult now. She wouldn't even think of how it would be in a month. She hadn't put on too much weight during the pregnancy - the doctor told her everything was going as smoothly as possible - but her belly seemed to grow bigger every day. It was a weird but interesting and lovely experience.

John pulled her dress over her head and Anna was glad of it. She sighed when she felt him kiss the back of her neck and slip his hand over her belly.

"You look beautiful," he murmured against her hair, and she closed her eyes. "I mean it."

Anna smiled weakly as he kissed her cheek one more time and let go of her. She reached for her nightgown and put it on - a rather long one, one of the few that made her feel comfortable.

"I think I knew that man," she told John softly, her back to him. "He looked familiar."

"Maybe he mistook you for someone else," John offered her, and she turned around and shook her head.

"We both know that's not the case," she sighed and sat on the bed. "What if he remembered me, John? Properly."

"It's been years. He wouldn't have known your real name," John said softly as he took off his shirt.

"No, but if he knew me," Anna said again, "what would happen to you? Your reputation."

"We are married," John said with a soft smile. "We have a baby on the way. We've been in a stable relationship for almost five years. No one questions that, and they wouldn't even if someone thought they knew you," he explained, sitting beside her. "Don't worry. It's the first time this happened."

"But if it happens again?" she asked weakly. Perhaps the hormones were making her more emotional.

"We'll deal with it. But it won't," he assured her. "You're a wonderful wife, you'll be the best mother in this world. You're an amazing professional and you have a solid career. Don't worry about this, my darling."

Anna nodded, but her doubts weren't completely gone yet. "What if... What if our child finds out? In the future. What will we say when she asks her how mummy and daddy met? What will we say about our relationship?"

"There's no reason why she would ever find out. None of our children will have to know," John said softly, stroking her belly through the material of her nightgown. Anna wiped a tear from her cheek. "About how we met, we'll just say we had business together. And we fell in love in the first meeting conference."

Anna let out a laugh. "Business, huh?"

He kissed her temple. "It's not a lie. Except that it was never business to me."

Anna turned her head to face him. "To me either," he kissed her lips softly. Her heart seemed to be in the right place now - solid and beating to its own rhythm and not too worried anymore. "I love you. So much."

"I love you too," he breathed. They shared a smile. She ran a hand through his dishevelled hair. "Both of you. More everyday."

And there, in the solace of his arms, in an impersonal hotel room, Anna felt reassured again. She knew they could handle whatever came in their way. They had come a long way since those passionate nights - and had many, many more of those, and many others filled with love and companionship and respect. In that moment, she wished for nothing else than to go back home, be with their baby properly. He had helped her achieve so many of her dreams, and this would be the biggest of them all.

It was never just business, but she would never have guessed, after their first night, that they would come this far - and still have so much to look forward to.

* * *

 _* Kind of based the second scene on a scene from the movie The Man From Uncle. The song Anna dances to is Cry To Me by Solomon Burke._


End file.
